Wednesday, September 11, 2013

How Sad, That It Has Come To This

Not only is today the anniversary of the original 9-11 attacks, it is also the one year anniversary of the attacks on our Benghazi consulate, the murders of four Americans there, and the subsequent cover-up.

At this point I despair of anyone being held accountable for the Benghazi debacle. But at least we can remember ... and speak out, even if our protests fall on deaf ears.






As for the original 9-11, I can only repeat what I said last year:



Tuesday, September 10, 2013

For Harper

As you know, I'm in D.C. for my uncle's funeral. A solemn affair grew even more somber last night as the Eagles dismantled the hapless Redskins.

I was going to take the high road after your uncalled for attack on my poor Longhorns. Granted, they were outrecruited , outcoached, and outplayed by BYU, but still...

A couple of interesting side notes: one, I can see the lights of FedEx field (home of the 'skins) from the balcony of my hotel room. Sitting out there having a beer while listening to the game on TV was most enjoyable. Two, one of the waitresses in the hotel bar was wearing a Cowboys T-shirt last night. She and I thoroughly enjoyed the game.

Wishing you the best going forward...

Monday, September 9, 2013

FOD 2013.09.09

From Andy Borowitz at the New Yorker:
Obama Shaken by Boehner’s Support
Aides to President Obama said today that he was “visibly shaken” after receiving support from House Speaker John Boehner for his Syria campaign, adding that the Speaker’s vote of confidence was “making him rethink the whole thing.”

An aide to Mr. Obama, speaking on the condition of anonymity, said that he was in the Oval Office with the President when he got the call from Mr. Boehner: “As it became clear that Boehner was going to support him on this, he looked more and more stunned. He was trying to stay calm and all but you could see that he was really taken aback.”

After putting down the phone with Mr. Boehner, the President reportedly told aides, “Boehner’s supporting it. That’s so weird. This is still a good idea, right?”
Moments after the President had “seemed to settle down,” the aide said, he received a phone call from House Majority Leader Eric Cantor, who also offered his support for the Syria plan.

“That one really rattled him,” the aide said. “He was like, ‘I think I need to take a long walk.’”

The calls from Mr. Boehner and Mr. Cantor have created what the aide called “the biggest crisis of confidence this President has ever experienced.”

“I checked in on him later in the day, just to see if he was O.K.,” the aide said. “He was cradling his head in his hands saying, ‘I just don’t know. I just don’t know anymore.’”
While the President’s plan to attack Syria remains on the table, the aide indicated that the situation is very fluid: “If Rand Paul calls today and says he’s in, the whole thing goes away.”
The above is satire, of course, but if you're like me it took you a while to catch on. That's because obama is such a divisive, partisan, narrow-minded ideologue that it certainly wouldn't surprise anyone if he opposed something simply because the other side supported it.

What follows is not satire, but reality. It is an excellent example of the alternate media... us ...doing the so-called mainstream media's job. (Note: this was shamelessly lifted from Jeff at A Nod To The Gods - good job, buddy).

At a press conference Friday after a summit of G20 leaders, obama said, "When London was getting bombed, it was profoundly unpopular both in Congress and around the country to help the British. It doesn't mean it wasn't the right thing to do."

The only problem with that statement is that it isn't even remotely true.
A Gallup poll in 1940, when the German bombing campaign in Britain took place, showed 60 percent of Americans felt it was more important to help England win,even at risk of going to war, than to stay out.

Additionally, 68 percent of Americans believed the future safety of the United States depended on England winning the war, and 85 percent felt England would lose if Americans stopped sending war materials to help.
Of course, the 'misstatement' went unremarked upon by the obama supporters masquerading as journalists.

What else is new...?



More here: "Barack Obama’s comparison of the civil war in Syria with World War Two is one of the most ridiculous assertions by a US president in recent times."

Sunday, September 8, 2013

Empty Shell Casings = Empty Brains

Since I mentioned that I'm headed to Washington D.C. for my uncle's funeral, both OldNFO and Toejam have warned me about this. (Thanks, fellows.)
Washington police are operating under orders to arrest tourists and other non-residents traveling with spent bullet or shotgun casings, a crime that carries a $1,000 fine, a year in jail and a criminal record...

"Empty shell casings are considered ammunition in Washington, D.C. ...
I guess that means I'd better take this off my key chain.



In case you can't figure out what it is, it's an NRA bottle opener made from an empty shell casing. I suppose the D.C. cops think it could be loaded into a weapon and and fired.

Idiots...

It is only fitting that the clowns running our nation's capital would think that empty shell casings are ammunition. After all, they also think that their empty heads contain brains...

Sunday Funnies 2013.09.08

This weekend is the first full weekend of college football. While it's hard for some of us to believe the season has started at last (the temperature down here yesterday was a most decidedly unfootball-like 100+ degrees), we nevertheless spent Saturday in front of the TV rooting against every single SEC team ... and Notre Dame.




During dinner one night, our friend Jim told us of his days playing football in college as a defensive lineman.

“Did you play sports in college?” his wife asked me.

“Yes,” I answered. “I was on West Point’s shooting team.”

“That’s great,” she said, appropriately impressed. “Offense or defense?”


A young boy and his mother were in the cemetery visiting the grave of a loved one. They came upon a headstone that read, “Here lies an Alabama graduate and an honest man.”

The boy asked his mother, “Mommy, why did they bury two men in there?”


Q:  Why do Tennessee fans wear orange?
A:  So they can dress that way for the game on Saturday, go hunting on Sunday, and wear it to pick up trash on Monday.

Q:  How many Florida freshmen football players does it take to change a light bulb?
A:  None. That’s a sophomore course.

Q:  How can you tell if an Auburn football player has a girlfriend?
A:  Tobacco juice on both sides of the pickup truck.

Q:  You are stuck in a cave with an angry grizzly bear, a mountain lion, and a Texas A&M fan. You have a gun with two bullets. What should you do?
A:  Shoot the Aggie fan…twice.

Q:  If three LSU football players are in a car, who is driving?
A:  The police officer.


I know that a few Washington Redskins fans drop by here from time to time. Here's one for them.

Q: What is the difference between a Redskins fan and a puppy?
A: After a while the puppy will stop whining.





Saturday, September 7, 2013

Cover Me - I'm Going To D.C.

I mentioned earlier that family matters have occupied much of my time lately. Nothing major, but just a lot of time-sinks. A few examples:

A friend of ours was unexpectedly in the vicinity. She's an editor for Reuters and was at Ft. Hood for the Hasan trial. Since our weekend lake house is only about an hour from there, we went up to keep her company. The trial ended on Wednesday but she didn't leave until Saturday. Lots of fun, great catching up with her, but it involved four days of showing her around Central Texas. (I shouldn't complain - four days of eating BBQ and visiting honky-tonks. Tough duty...)

Speaking of the lake house, a couple of days after we left it and returned home a neighbor called. Turns out a pack of feral hogs passed through the neighborhood and rooted up our yard. I had to go back up there and do what I could to minimize the damage. Damn pigs...

A few days after that friends of ours from Houston dropped in. By then we were back in our main HQ in Bergheim. We spent the Labor Day weekend grilling, drinking, playing golf, drinking, sitting on the back porch, drinking...

By now I'm sure you're feeling sorry for me. But seriously, folks, it hasn't all been fun and games.

Several years ago my parents moved from a condo they owned to an assisted living facility. The condo has been rented out since their departure. The tenants moved out at the beginning of August, so we decided it was time to sell the place. Since I'm now retired, guess who became responsible for fixing it up prior to putting it on the market? Yes, it was your humble correspondent. Painting, cleaning, minor repairs ... all that good stuff. Nothing overwhelming, but very time consuming.

In the midst of all that, a pipe broke in my father's assisted living apartment (my mother passed away after they moved). Again, guess who got to clean up the mess? And just to make things more complicated, while we were making arrangements to repair the pipe and replace the mildewed carpet, my uncle died.

It wasn't a total surprise. His health had been failing for a while, and last week he was moved into a hospice. But what it means is that I have to put everything on hold as far as my Dad's place is concerned while I head up to Washington D.C. for the funeral. I leave tomorrow (Sunday) and return late Wednesday evening.

My aunt and uncle actually live outside the immediate D.C. area in New Carrollton. They've lived there in the same house for the past 50+ years. The area has changed over that time, from your typical white-bread suburb to a more diverse makeup. It's now about 15% white and 60% black. While not making any racial judgements, I will note that the property values and general 'feeling comfortable' index have gone downhill over the years. (Here's a different perspective, but IMO you can read between the lines.) Anyway...

In any event, I'm flying into BWI because it's about half the cost of flying into D.C. direct. However, that amounts to double jeopardy, since Baltimore is at least as much if not more dangerous than D.C. Couple the crime rates (much higher than what I'm used to) with draconian restrictions on self-defense (I have a Texas concealed carry license. That doesn't cut much mustard in MD or D.C.) and I'm feeling a little nervous about my visit to our nation's capitol. And just to top things off, I'll be flying back home on 9/11 - no security issues there.

Pray for me...

Life Interfers With Life

There's some stuff going on with my family (nothing major, just normal time-consuming family stuff) that is eating up my free time. So today's post is a quick-and-dirty cut-and-paste pictorial follow-up to a recent post about how the libs are blaming Bush for the mess obama is making of Syria and the Middle East.







Friday, September 6, 2013

Friday Follies Happy Hour 2013.09.06

Dedicated to Robert Placette (see the previous post).

The video quality isn't the best, but it gets the point across...

Doing The Right Thing - Yes, No, and Maybe

This one hits close to home, for several reasons.
Houston police released surveillance photos of three suspects wanted in the fatal shooting of one man and the wounding of another at a Denny’s in west Houston.

The suspects were described as three males with their faces concealed by bandanas or masks.

It happened at the Denny’s along Interstate 10 at Washington Avenue around 10:30 p.m. Monday, according to officers with the Houston Police Department.
We used to live in that general area. I would on occasion drop into that particular Denny's for a late (or early - depends on whether I was coming or going) breakfast.
Police said three men went into the restaurant and ordered all customers and employees to the ground.
Surveillance photo of three suspects wanted in the fatal shooting of one man and the wounding of another at a Denny’s restaurant in Houston.
A family member of one of the victims said the men took purses and cell phones, and even pointed their guns at small children. The men also stole money from the customers and the cash register.

Witnesses said the robbers became angry and started shooting before they left the scene. The bullets struck a customer and an employee who was trying to escape out the front door.

Family members identify the customer as 64-year-old Robert Placette, who later died at Memorial Hermann Hospital.

"He was a good man who always tried to do right by people," said Drue Placette, the victim’s son.

Witnesses say Placette was standing in front of terrified children to protect them when he was shot in the chest.

"They said when they started pointing guns at the kids like that, he got up and stood in front of them. That is the only thing that kind of makes me happy, makes me smile, makes me proud that he would do that," said Drue. "I think that my dad died honorably and I hope people remember that."
He definitly did the right and honorable thing that night. God Bless him, and God Damn his killers. (Doing The Right Thing - Yes!)

Left unreported by just about every media outlet was the fact that the three thugs were black. I don't want to make this all about race. I don't think the robbery or the shooting were racially motivated. However, when a significant physical characteristic that could help identify the robbers/killers is deliberately omitted from news reports, it's clear that the media is making a conscious decision to protect the image of a specific ethnic group. (Go here to see the surveillance photos.)

And that IS racist. (Doing The Right Thing - No!)

Also not reported is whether this particular Denny's follows the general corporate trend and has a No Guns sign posted on the front door. Which brings me to my final point.

"No Guns" signs put those of us who legally carry in an awkward situation. Do we follow the rules and risk becoming helpless targets, or do we break the rules and become criminals, like the savages in Houston? (Doing The Right Thing - Maybe?)

Thursday, September 5, 2013

Syria Snippets

from Drudge:

It's All Bush's Fault
CARVILLE: ...I think what really is freaking people out is the incompetence of the Bush administration in Iraq.

O'REILLY: You're going to blame Bush?

CARVILLE: Of course, the Iraq thing is why people have so much trepidation about going into Syria. They said the last time we went over there, look what happened. I really think this has something to do with it.

from Leno:
"The Syrian resolution could be the first time congress declares war since obamacare."

from JammieWearingFools:
'Obama' commode sparks controversy in NM town - Outhouse sign says "Obama's Presidential Library"
Just a stone's-throw away from historic Route 66 in Tucumcari sits a sign that everyone's talking about.

The sign sits atop an outhouse and says "Obama's Presidential Library."
Some in town say it's in bad taste, while others support it. Either way, everyone knows about it. One man said people have been treating it like a tourist destination, taking pictures all the time.

As for the man who put it up, he refused to give Target 7 his name or reveal what prompted him to construct the controversial commode, but he said he has no intention of taking it down.

"It's like watching TV. If you don't like what the hell you're watching, turn the channel," said the man who put up the sign. "I'm not even certain he even deserves that level of respect, but that's my opinion."

"That's my opinion ... and fortunately, that's one thing they haven't taken away from us ... is our right to our opinion," said the man who constructed the sign.
Yet...

A Modest Proposal That We Desperately Need

Thirty-plus years ago the Texas legislature established something called the Sunset Advisory Commission. It's stated purpose:
"to identify and eliminate waste, duplication, and inefficiency in government agencies ... The Commission questions the need for each agency, looks for potential duplication of other public services or programs, and considers new and innovative changes to improve each agency's operations and activities."
Like many government programs it has produced mixed results. It's a good idea beset by politics and flawed implementation. Still, overall it has done more good than harm, which is not something we can say about most other legislation (see: obamacare).

I've long desired to see a similar law put into effect at the national level. Now there's a chance that may come to pass.

Thomas Stemberg is the founder of Staples - the national office supply chain. Here's what he has to say on the matter in a recent WSJ article.
Nearly 30 years ago, I started a company called Staples Inc. that went on to do pretty well. Launching a business like Staples in 2013 would be a much harder proposition, with success by no means certain. There are so many government impediments to business today that the next Staples—and its 50,000 jobs—might never get off the ground.

Chief among those roadblocks: the blizzard of bureaucratic red tape that buries businesses and stifles job creation ... All told, American business faces 46,758 pages of rules to live by in the Federal Register.

This confounding web of federal regulations may be curtailed if Sens. Angus King (independent, Maine) and Roy Blunt (R., Mo.) have anything to say about it. Their Regulatory Improvement Act of 2013 could be a game changer.

The legislation introduced in late July would create a bipartisan Regulatory Improvement Commission, charged with recommending cuts in the regulatory regime, and the law would require Congress to vote on the proposals. This is desperately needed. The government has few processes at its disposal through which it can re-evaluate the efficacy of outdated regulations—and many members of Congress lack the expertise, time and courage to effectively scale them back.
The King-Blunt proposal is modeled on the Defense Base Realignment and Closure Commission (BRAC). Like the Texas Sunset Commission, BRAC consists of an independent, bipartisan panel. It was created in the late 1980s and tasked with reducing the number of military bases. While not everyone agrees with everything BRAC recommends, the results have been significant.
Since 1988, there have been 121 major base closures, 79 major base realignments (which may close down part of a facility or transfer personnel away from it) and 1,000 minor closures and realignments under BRAC.

In short, the BRAC Commission gave politicians what they crave most: cover. Nobody back home could blame them for losing a military base. The King-Blunt proposal will give representatives the same cover with regulations.
The proposed bipartisan Regulatory Improvement Commission would be charged with identifying redundant, obsolete, and excessive regulations. We all can cite numerous examples of such job-killing and economy-strangling rules. Below are two such tales. The first one is, sadly and unbelievably, true. The second one is not (but no one would be surprised if it was).

Tales of the Red Tape #40: The USDA Rabbit Police
There’s no good way to deliver this disturbing bit of news except to come right out with it: Marty the Magician and others in the business of pulling a rabbit from a hat are under strict orders from the federal government to develop a “contingency plan” for handling their critters in the event of a natural or man-made disaster.

Said plan will be evaluated once a year, when enforcers from the U.S. Department of Agriculture (USDA) make their annual unannounced bunny home inspections. Oh, and all magicians are required to carry a copy of the contingency plan at all times and make it available for inspection while in “travel status."

With the July 29 compliance deadline looming, the USDA recently sent Marty the Magician (aka Marty Hahne of Springfield, Missouri) an eight-page communiqué detailing requirements for the plan, which must:
  • Identify common emergencies most likely to occur,
  • Outline specific tasks required to be carried out in response to each of the identified emergencies,
  • Identify a chain of command and who (by name or by position title) will be responsible for fulfilling these tasks, and
  • Address how response and recovery will be handled in terms of materials, resources, and training needs.
All of which means that Marty must prepare for all the calamities that could possibly befall Casey the Rabbit while making the rounds of more than 150 performance venues he visits each year, including schools, libraries, churches, and homes.
Alas, this isn’t Marty’s first encounter with the bunny patrol. By law, magicians must be licensed by the federal government to use rabbits in their acts, as specified in Title 9, Chapter I, Subchapter A, Parts 1-4 of the Animal Welfare Act.

Marty’s first home inspection didn’t go so well. He was written up because Casey’s travel cage lacked stickers indicating “live animal” and the arrows pointing upward (in the event he’s tempted to carry the cage upside down). When questioning the enforcement action, Marty was warned that verbal abuse of an inspector carries a fine of $1,000 per incident.
Yes, you read that right. The federal government actually has an agency (and agents!) that regulates and inspects bunny rabbits used in magic acts - and intimidates anyone who dares question them.

To make matters worse, they're armed.

Now for the fictional story (hard to tell them apart, isn't it.)

Noah and the Ark - Updated
In the year 2013, the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in America and said: "Once again, the earth has become wicked and over-populated, and I see the end of all flesh before me."

"Build another Ark and save two of every living thing along with a few good humans."

He gave Noah the blueprints, saying: "You have six months to build the Ark before I will start the unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights."

Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his yard – but no Ark."Noah!," He roared, "I’m about to start the rain! Where is the Ark?"

"Forgive me, Lord," begged Noah, "but things have changed."

"I needed a Building Permit."

"I’ve been arguing with the Boat Inspector about the need for a sprinkler system."

"My homeowners association claim that I’ve violated the Neighborhood by-laws by building the Ark in my back yard and exceeding the height limitations. We had to go to the local Planning Committee for a decision."

"Then the City Council and the Electricity Company demanded a shed load of money for the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead obstructions, to clear the passage for the Ark’s move to the sea. I told them that the sea would be coming to us, but they would hear none of it."

"Getting the wood was another problem. There’s a ban on cutting local trees in order to save the Greater Spotted Barn Owl."

"I tried to convince the environmentalists that I needed the wood to save the owls – but no go!"

"When I started gathering the animals, PETA took me to court. They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their will. They argued the accommodations were too restrictive and it was cruel and inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space."

"Then the Environmental Protection Agency ruled that I couldn’t build the Ark until they’d conducted an environmental impact study on Your proposed flood."

"I’m still trying to resolve a complaint with the Human Rights Commission on how many minorities I’m supposed to hire for my building crew."

"The Immigration Dept. Is checking the visa status of most of the people who want to work."

"The labor unions say I can’t use my sons. They insist I have to hire only union workers with ark-building experience."

"To make matters worse, the IRS seized all my assets, claiming I’m trying to leave the country illegally with endangered species."

"So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least 10 years for me to finish this ark."

"Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine and a rainbow stretched across the sky."

Noah looked up in wonder and asked, "You mean you’re not going to destroy the world?"

"No," said the Lord. " The Government beat me to it."
Amen...

Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Hillary Update

Terrorist activity has caused the democrats to take measures in order to protect their presumed candidate for the 2016 presidential race.

For security reasons, hillary will now be referred to by her new muslim name:
Seldom Bin Layed


On a more serious note, hillary has been MIA in the ongoing discussion about Syria. I wonder why...
One voice in Washington that has been remarkably absent from this week’s Syria debate has been that of former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton. The frontrunner for the 2016 Democratic presidential nomination, Mrs. Clinton hasn’t said anything at all about President Obama’s plans for military strikes against the dictatorship in Damascus. As someone who dominated the US foreign policy landscape over the past four years, Clinton’s silence on Syria is striking. What explains this?

I suspect a number of factors are behind Hillary Clinton’s reticence. Firstly, a US military intervention in the Syrian civil war is strongly opposed by the vast majority of the American public. A recent poll showed just nine percent of Americans backing US military involvement. She probably doesn’t see another war in the Muslim world as a vote winner in 2016. Secondly, she may well be harbouring doubts over the White House approach, which beyond the talk of airstrikes, lacks a coherent strategy, and the president hasn’t exactly made a clear-cut case that taking America to war in Syria is in the national interest. Thirdly, as “the Obama doctrine” goes down in flames in the Middle East, from Damascus to Cairo, Clinton will be nervous about being seen as part and parcel of it, which of course she is.

Fourthly, Clinton’s own track record on Syria has hardly been stellar. Before Syria descended into war, Clinton was a strong backer of engagement with Syria, greatly underestimating the nature of the Baathist regime, famously referring to Syrian President Bashar al-Assad as a “reformer” in April 2011. In addition, as Washington’s most senior foreign policy official, Clinton did little to stand up to Moscow’s aggressive support for the Syrians, eager to appease the Russians through the controversial “reset” strategy, which was her own brainchild. In addition, the Secretary of State was weak in the face of Iran, whose military and financial backing for the Assad regime has been vital to its survival.

Against this backdrop it’s not hard to see why Hillary Clinton isn’t at the forefront of the Syria debate. Her own handling of the Syria crisis was a spectacular failure, as has been President Obama's. The last thing she needs in the lead-up to her inevitable White House run is a reminder to Americans of her poor track record as Secretary of State, from the Syrian debacle to the farcical Russian reset. Syria is a liability for Clinton in 2016, and with good reason she is nervous about what happens next.
She may very well be nervous about what happens next. She damn sure should be, since she's in it up to her wrinkled saggy neck and beady little lying eyes. But as we've seen repeatedly in the past, she is sure to get a pass from her adoring fans in the mainstream media. By the time 2016 rolls around, everyone posing as a newspaper or television journalist will have forgotten all about Libya and Syria.

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Dog Days

Between all the 'phony' scandals dogging obama, the recovery that isn't, and the muddled-up mess that is obama's failed Mid-East policy, things haven't been going to well for our beloved prez. That could be what led to the recent acquisition by the obamas of Sunny, the new puppy that now makes the White House his home.
This week, the Obamas welcomed a new member to the first family -- a 14-month-old female Portuguese Water dog called Sunny.

"Bo was getting lonely," the president said when asked why they got Sunny. "[He] was getting a little down in the dumps inside the house." With Sunny around, though, 4-year-old Bo has a playmate.
Sunny and Bo take a break from their carefree frolicking.
First Lady Michelle Obama, meanwhile, is in "full parenting mode," the president said -- especially because little Sunny has already had a few accidents in the White House.
Sunny isn't the only one making messes in the White House.
The president didn't seemed too concerned though.

"We live in rental housing. We didn't have to put down a deposit," he said.
That pretty much confirms what we already know about that worthless freeloader (barry, not Sunny).

It turns out that there may be a more underhanded reason for the obamas' new dog.
In a 2012 paper entitled “Unleashing Presidential Power: The Politics of Pets in the White House,” and published in the journal PS: Political Science & Politics, three professors at George Washington University tracked press mentions of First Pets in order to examine the hypothesis that Administrations showcase furry friends to burnish a President’s image during times of war or scandal but keep them out of sight during economic downturns—the theory being that pets, sometimes a “reassuring public presence” during times of upheaval or war, are likely to trigger resentment if they are perceived to be “frolicking on the White House lawn in hard times.”

The authors ultimately found that higher inflation and unemployment figures related to fewer pet mentions in the press, and that incidents of military action or Presidential scandal were correlated with greater pet coverage.
The way things are going lately, we'll probably see a steady stream of new pets parading across the White House lawn...

Monday, September 2, 2013

FOD 2013.09.02

You can't make this stuff up.

President Obama Announces Next Steps on Syria, Heads to Golf Course
Roughly half an hour after announcing his administration would seek congressional approval for military intervention in Syria’s civil war, President Obama left the White House for the golf course.
Un-friggin'-believable.

The following images are courtesy of Jeff at A Nod To The Gods:








Sunday, September 1, 2013

Sunday Funnies 2013.09.01

Hope you're enjoying the Labor Day weekend!



  • Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?  -- Edgar Bergen
  • Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work.  -- Robert Orben
  • One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important.  -- Bertrand Russell




My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned...couldn't concentrate.
Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the ax.
After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it ...mainly because it was a so-so job.
Next I tried working in a muffler factory but that was too exhausting.
Then I tried to be a chef -- figured it would add a little spice to my life, but I just didn't have the thyme.
I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it, I couldn't cut the mustard.
My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I wasn't noteworthy.
I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patience.
Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried but I just didn't fit in.
I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.
I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work was just too draining.
So then I got a job in a workout center, but they said I wasn't fit for the job.
After many years of trying to find steady work I finally got a job as a historian until I realized there was no future in it.
My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit because it was always the same old grind.
I tried self-employment but I couldn’t get along with the boss.


A business owner walked through his office and found an employee playing video games on his computer.
“Why aren’t you working?” he asked.
“Because I didn’t see you coming,” answered the employee.




Saturday, August 31, 2013

Hard Times In Nevada

Lots of businesses have been suffering during the obama economic 'recovery.' But I never thought that would include brothels.
 The legal prostitution industry in Nevada is on its back. So say brothel owners, their employees and customers.

George Flint, who somehow manages to be both a retired minister and the brothel industry's lobbyist (hey, it's Nevada) told ABC News that gross revenues are down 40 percent to 50 percent from what they were 10 years ago. The number of legal operators has shrunk from 37 to 19.

"Just like every other small business in the U.S.," said Flint, "brothels have been affected by the downturn in the economy. In as much as they depend on discretionary spending, there's not a lot of that to go around."

Brothel experts say additional factors explain their industry's slump. The Internet now makes it easy for illegal, freelance prostitutes to hook up with customers, circumventing legal brothels.

"Substitute service is being offered," Flint said.
Like Miley Cyrus...
In addition, he said, the price of diesel fuel is up. That means truckers -- among brothels' most reliable customers -- have less to spend.

Not all brothels are suffering equally.

"Small mom-and-pop operations with three or four girls" are suffering the worst, said Flint.
"mom-and-pop operations" ... really? You'd think a lobbyist could come up with a better term for small establishments.
But even the biggest operations are reporting sharp declines. The owner of the famous Mustang Ranch, said Flint, told him just the other day that his business, compared to a year ago, is down by 3,000 "dates."

"The concept that sex will always sell probably is not a true concept," said the lobbyist. "It's not that there's any less interest in sex; it's just that people don't have the dollars to spend."

Hard times beget consolidation, and at least one big, deep-pocketed operator is using the downturn as a chance to expand by buying up struggling competitors.

Dennis Hof, who owns the Moonlight Bunny Ranch outside Carson City, Nev., told Bloomberg that the recession has allowed him to buy five more brothels, bringing his total to seven.

When the economy comes back, Bloomberg quoted him as saying, "I think I'm going to do real well."
In gambling, that's called "betting on the come."
Meanwhile, a new threat looms on the horizon: higher taxation. To date, brothels have not been subject to Nevada's 8 percent tax on live entertainment. But bills introduced in the state's last legislative session would change that.
Combining a new tax on brothels with existing estate taxes means the tax man will get you coming and going...

Idle brothel workers sit around and discuss the economy.

Friday, August 30, 2013

Friday Follies Happy Hour 08.30.13

Two of my all-time favorites from my neck of the woods team up for some down-home boogie blues.

Delbert McClinton and Marcia Ball ... it just don't get no better than this...

Oatmeal - It's Good For What Ails You

Well, it's Labor Day Weekend. And that can only mean one thing.

Yes, boys and girls, it's once again time for the annual Oatmeal Festival!
Bertram is perhaps best known for its Oatmeal Festival held each year on the Friday and Saturday before Labor Day (August 30th & 31st, 2013). Begun in 1977 as a good-natured attempt to put neighboring Oatmeal back on the map after state map-makers ignored the tiny neighboring community, the festival has evolved into one of the wackiest, most imaginative small-town festivals anywhere.

In 2013, Bertram celebrates 36 years of craziness and fun, and as always, it will actually "rain" oatmeal during the parade! (Watch out for Commander Caraway and the Oatmeal Air Force). Each year visitors come from far and wide, appreciating Bertram's sense of humor and their small town pride and friendliness. Because the festival is sponsored by Three Minutes Brand Oats, every event starts at 3 or 33 minutes past the hour.

The festival begins on Friday night with a BBQ dinner and the Miss Oatmeal Pageant in Oatmeal. A trail-ride moves the festivities to Bertram on Saturday morning, which includes a fun-run, parade, cook-off, zany games, food, and arts and crafts, kids events and more.
There's even an Oatmeal Festival T-Shirt Contest. (Sorry, guys, no wet t-shirts involved. Instead, it's a 'design the offical Oatmeal Festival T-shirt contest.')

On a somewhat serious note, there's so much doom and gloom in the news these days that it's refreshing to realize there's still a lot of good old-fashioned small-town All-American fun out there. So go out and find some yourself this holiday weekend.

As for me, I'll be taking my sugar to the Oatmeal Festival!...



Thursday, August 29, 2013

Quit Your Wining

I like to drink wine, although my palette isn't refined enough to appreciate the subtleties of different types and vintages. Consequently, I am an enthusiastic but unsophisticated consumer. So I am approaching today - Cabernet Day - much like a Labrador Retriever approaches a tennis ball; that is, with excitement that threatens to overwhelm my common sense.
In the big beef state of Texas, cabernet sauvignon is king. The bold red wine stands up to our favorite food group — barbecue. The upcoming Cabernet Day on Thursday is meant to help people discover new wines from this varietal.
In keeping with that spirit, I'm sharing my thoughts on a big bold wine from the Three Thieves vineyard - The Show.
The Show combines grapes from the Central Coast, Sonoma County, Lake County, Mendocino, Lodi and Napa Valley AVA’s. Anchored by full-bodied Cabernet, it also features Petite Sirah which gives it a deep ruby color and a hint of violets on the nose. The Show is aged in French and American oak.

The Show grabs your attention. Big and bold, it is dominated by full flavors of dried black cherries, jammy preserves and complex toasty, vanilla, and spicy oak.
Word.

I like it slightly chilled. Just stick it in the fridge for an hour or so before opening. Let it sit for a few minutes to take the edge off, then pour a glass or two and enjoy. Very flavorful, very spirited, very enjoyable, and last but not least, very affordable.

Plus I like the label.


And yes, I'll be serving beef tonight. Grilled T-bones with all the fixin's.

Mmmmm...