Simple Truths Of Life

I am exceedingly weary of politics, and I suspect most of you are as well. So today I've decided to reflect upon three simple truths of life.

SIMPLE TRUTH 1

Partners help each other undress before sex.

However, after sex, they always dress on their own.

Moral of the story: In life, no one helps you once you're screwed.

SIMPLE TRUTH 2

When a lady is pregnant, all her friends touch her stomach and say "congratulations".

But none of them touch the man's penis and say "Good job".

Moral of the story: Hard work is never appreciated.

SIMPLE TRUTH 3