Tuesday, December 31, 2013

New Years Eve 2013

We're heading out tonight for a neighborhood New Years Eve party.

No, not that kind of party... more like this kind:
The proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year’s Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you’re married to.
-- P.J. O’Rourke
But before we go, I'd like to pass on my sincere wishes to everyone out there for a safe and enjoyable New Year's Eve, followed by a very Happy, Healthy, and Prosperous 2014.

The Year In Review

As 2013 draws to a close we are deluged with "year in review" stories and lists. Most aren't worth the time it takes to skim them, but there is one I look forward to every year. It is Dave Barry's annual retrospective on the events and personalities that made the year 'special.' An excerpt:
... The Cold War with Russia came back. Al-Qaeda came back. Turmoil in the Middle East came back. The debt ceiling came back. The major league baseball drug scandal came back. Dennis Rodman came back and went on humanitarian missions to North Korea (or maybe we just hallucinated that). The Endlessly Looming Government Shutdown came back. People lining up to buy iPhones to replace iPhones that they bought only minutes earlier came back. And for approximately the 250th time, the Obama administration pivoted back to the economy, which has somehow been recovering for years now without actually getting any better. Unfortunately, before they could get the darned thing fixed, the administration had to pivot back to yet another zombie issue, health care, because it turned out that Obamacare, despite all the massive brainpower behind it, had some “glitches,” in the same sense that the universe has some “atoms.”
Go here to read the whole thing. It's well worth your time.

Monday, December 30, 2013

FOD 2013.12.30

obama is away on vacation wasting taxpayer money in Hawaii. Yet he still managed to be in the news, thanks mostly to his monumental screw-ups. Here's a mini-syonpsis of the past week.

Speaking of obama's vacation, Pat Sajak nailed it with this tweet.
"Fewer speeches, no press conferences, fewer decrees. Never thought I'd find someone else's vacation so relaxing."
Unfortunately, some of the messes barry made before he left town are coming back to haunt him - and us.

Surprise! Iran building better centrifuges
Do we wonder what the Iranians think of President Obama?

If they think about him at all, they are probably laughing up their sleeves. The government announced that they are constructing the next generation of centrifuges - the machines that spin uranium thousands of times a second in order to enrich the ore, turning U-235 into U-238.

Um...isn't that in violation of the agreement President Obama was crowing about a few weeks ago?
Sure it is. And it doesn't surprise anyone with half a brain - which leaves out the loser-in-chief and his advisors.

Next topic: for someone who is reputed to be a former constitutional law professor, our barry sure has a lot to learn about 'the law of the land.'

obama's Top 10 Constitutional Violations Of 2013
One of Barack Obama’s chief accomplishments has been to return the Constitution to a central place in our public discourse.

Unfortunately, the president fomented this upswing in civic interest not by talking up the constitutional aspects of his policy agenda, but by blatantly violating the strictures of our founding document.
The Constitution isn't the only thing barry has broken. He's also pretty good at breaking his promises.

Ten Broken obamacare Promises
Since the passage of Obamacare in 2010, many of the President’s famous promises have been routinely broken. As he so ironically threatened in 2009, “If you misrepresent what’s in this plan, we will call you out.”  To that end, here are 10 promises of Obamacare that have already proved to be broken.
Here's a story with tragic consequences that will hit home with many of us.

Shades of Vietnam: Spike in U.S. troop deaths tied to stricter rules of engagement
“It is no accident nor a coincidence that from January 2009 to August of 2010, coinciding with the Obama/McChrystal radical change of the [rules of engagement], casualties more than doubled,” Mr. Simmons said. “The carnage will certainly continue as the already fragile and ineffective [rules] have been further weakened by the Obama administration as if they were playground rules.”
We now have lawyers making tactical decisions about when it is acceptable for our troops to defend themselves, return fire, and call in air strikes. Crazy...

I've run out of words to describe what obama is doing to our country. The best I can do is the image below.

Sunday, December 29, 2013

Sunday Funnies 2013.12.29

The New Year is coming. Brace yourself...

Last New Year's Eve my wife and I went to a party at the local watering hole. As the time neared midnight my wife stood up and said "It's time to get ready. At twelve o'clock I want every husband to be standing next to the one person who has made his life worth living."

When the clock struck midnight the bartender was almost crushed to death.

The New Year's Eve party had turned into a regular marathon with numerous guests coming and going. At one point, a man knocked on the door, was greeted heartily although no one knew who he was, and was led to the bar.

He sat there happily for a couple of hours before a strange look came over his face. "You know," he confided to his host: "I wasn't even invited to this party. I just came over to tell you that some of your guests' cars are blocking my driveway."

The guest continued: "My wife's been sitting out in the car waiting for me to get them moved."

New Year's Eve is like having sex with my second ex-wife.

10 seconds of pleasure then another year before it happens again.

Saturday, December 28, 2013

My Wife Is A Saint

I'll freely admit that I'm not the easiest person to live with. But that's only to be expected. It's very difficult to live with someone who is never wrong...

In any event, my wife is a good woman who puts up with a lot. Oh sure, she has her moments ... but even at her worst she's miles ahead of this wacko.

No beer led to ceramic squirrel stabbing
South Carolina authorities say a 44-year-old woman angry at a man for returning home without beer on Christmas beat and stabbed him with a ceramic squirrel.

The Charleston County Sheriff's office says in a report that deputies found a man covered with blood when they arrived at Helen Williams' North Charleston home early Wednesday. She told investigators the man fell and cut himself, but couldn't explain why her hands and clothes were also bloody.

Deputies say the man said Williams was so angry when he returned without beer because stores were closed on Christmas Eve that she grabbed a ceramic squirrel, beat him in the head, then stabbed him in the shoulder and chest.
God help that poor guy if he ever comes home without something she really wants...

Beers and Ferraris

Woman: Do you drink beer?
Man: Yes

Woman: How many beers a day?
Man: Usually about 3

Woman: How much do you pay per beer?
Man: $5.00 which includes a tip

Woman: And how long have you been drinking?
Man: About 20 years, I suppose

Woman: So a beer costs $5 and you have 3 beers a day which puts your spending each month at $450. In one year, it would be approximately $5400 …correct?
Man: Correct

Woman: If in 1 year you spend $5400, not accounting for inflation, the past 20 years puts your spending at $108,000, correct?
Man: Correct

Woman: Do you know that if you didn't drink so much beer, that money could have been put in a savings account and after accounting for compound interest for the past 20 years, you could have now bought a Ferrari?

Man: Do you drink beer?


Man: Where's your Ferrari?

Friday, December 27, 2013

How To Tell Christmas Is Over

Q: How can you tell when Christmas is over?

A: When Santa goes shopping for himself.

Friday Follies Happy Hour 2013.12.27

A little Delbert McClinton to get the weekend started right. He shows us that the Lone Star Blues can be fun...

George Is Rolling In His Grave

In a recent post I made mention of Newspeak, a language created by George Orwell in his novel 1984. Newspeak is defined as "the language of bureaucrats and politicians, regarded as deliberately ambiguous and misleading."

Here are two excellent examples.

In an appearance on Sunday night’s 60 Minutes, National Security Advisor Susan Rice was asked about Director of National Intelligence James Clapper's appearance before congress back in March of this year. In that appearance, Clapper flat-out denied that the NSA collects data on hundreds of millions of Americans. That statement, of course, was later revealed to be what you and I would call a lie. Rice, however, who is fluent in Newspeak, said that Clapper and other NSA officials didn't lie about the data gathering, but instead “inadvertently made false representations.”

Clapper himself, when asked at a later date about his statement, characterized it as not a lie, but rather as the “least untruthful”answer he could have provided.

You might also recall that before she became obama's national Security Advisor, Susan Rice was the U.S. Ambassador to the United Nations. She was in line to succeed Hillary Clinton as Secretary of State until she made a fool of herself by blaming the deaths of four Americans during a terrorist attack on our consulate in Benghazi on a YouTube video. In the 60 Minutes interview she referred to that as a "false controversy."

We've come a long way from George "I cannot tell a lie" Washington...

It's Almost 2014...

... which means we'll shortly be buried under an avalanche of stories about the midterm elections in November. Here's a few early ones.

GOP has edge in early midterm indicator
Democrats have lost their advantage and Republicans now have a slight edge in the battle for control of Congress, according to a new national poll.

A CNN/ORC International survey released Thursday also indicates that President Barack Obama may be dragging down Democratic congressional candidates, and that the 2014 midterm elections are shaping up to be a low-turnout event, with only three in 10 registered voters extremely or very enthusiastic about voting next year.

Two months ago, Democrats held a 50%-42% advantage among registered voters in a generic ballot, which asked respondents to choose between a Democrat or Republican in their congressional district without identifying the candidates. That result came after congressional Republicans appeared to overplay their hand in the bitter fight over the federal government shutdown and the debt ceiling.

But the Democratic lead evaporated, and a CNN poll a month ago indicated the GOP holding a 49%-47% lead. The new survey, conducted in mid-December, indicates Republicans with a 49%-44% edge over the Democrats.

The 13-point swing over the past two months follows a political uproar over Obamacare, which included the botched rollout of HealthCare.gov and controversy over the possibility of insurance policy cancellations due primarily to the new health law.
Of course, there's a long way to go until November. The republicans have plenty of time to screw things up. But just in case, we can expect even more obamacare tweaks (twerks...?) from the administration, along with a surge of positive stories from the media touting the benefits of obamacare.

In other political news, two recent polls show Chris Christie either tied with or slightly leading hillary in the 2016 presidential race.

Christie Leads Hillary for President by 3 Points
Republican New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie leads former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton in a hypothetical presidential matchup, beating her by 3 points, 45 percent to 42 percent, a Public Policy Polling survey released Wednesday showed.
Clinton deadlocked with Christie
In a potential preview of the next presidential election, a new national poll suggests Hillary Clinton and Chris Christie would be neck and neck if the 2016 contest were held today.
Regardless of how you feel about Chrisite - and I'm not a fan - he seems to represent a legitimate threat to the democrats' chances of holding on to the White House once obama is evicted. So brace yourself for an onslaught of negative stories about Christie.

Like this hatchet job from the NYT.

Christie Has History of Bullying, Petty Attacks
New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie often takes petty revenge against people who he believes have slighted him...
Is the timing of the NYT story, coming shortly after the release of the Christie-Clinton polls, a coincidence?

I think not...

Thursday, December 26, 2013

You May Be A Radical Islamist

This blog ain't much, but at least it gives me an outlet for my ramblings, rantings, and ravings. It also spares my poor wife from having to listen to them. And while we may joke about the NSA monitoring us and the IRS targeting us, we really don't have to worry about the government taking action against us for what we post (I think...).

People in other parts of the world aren't as fortunate.
A judge in Saudi Arabia has recommended that imprisoned blogger Raif Badawi go before a high court on a charge of apostasy, which would carry the death penalty upon conviction...

Badawi's legal troubles started shortly after he started the Free Saudi Liberals website in 2008. He was detained for one day and questioned about the site. Some clerics even branded him an unbeliever and apostate.

In July, a Jeddah criminal court found Badawi, who has been in prison since June 2012, guilty of insulting Islam through his Free Saudi Liberals website and in television comments.

Badawi was sentenced to seven years in prison and 600 lashes...
First they imprison the guy. Then they gave him 600 lashes. Now he might be executed. All for 'insulting' islam.

I guess I won't be traveling to Saudi Arabia anytime soon.
1. If you refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor,
You may be a radical islamist.

2. If you own a $8,000 machine gun and $12,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes,
You may be a radical islamist.

3. If you have more wives than teeth,
You may be a radical islamist.

4. If you wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon to be unclean,
You may be a radical islamist.

5. If you think vests come in two styles: Bullet-proof and suicide.
You may be a radical islamist.

6. If you can't think of anyone you haven't declared jihad against,
You may be a radical islamist..

7. If you consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing,
You may be a radical islamist.

8. If you were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs,
You may be a radical islamist.

9. If you have nothing against women and think every man should own at least four,
You may be a radical islamist.

10. If you find this offensive or racist,
You may be a radical islamist.

What I Got For Christmas

Putting Your Christmas In Perspective

I hope everyone had a truly wonderful Christmas, filled with the best the season has to offer. We certainly did.

Christmas night, after opening presents and stuffing myself with an incredible Christmas dinner, I sat down to browse the Internet. I ran across several posts discussing the stress of the holiday - shopping, traffic, relatives, and so forth. We all have to deal with those to one extent or the other. They can certainly be a downer during what is supposed to be a joyous time of the year.

Then I came across this story.
As Christmas 1970 approached, 43 American prisoners of war in a large holding cell at the North Vietnamese camp known as the Hanoi Hilton sought to hold a brief church service. Their guards stopped them, and so the seeds of rebellion were planted.

A few days later, Lt. Cmdr. Edwin A. Shuman III, a downed Navy pilot, orchestrated the resistance, knowing he would be the first to face the consequences: a beating in a torture cell.

“Ned stepped forward and said, ‘Are we really committed to having church Sunday? I want to know person by person,’ ” a fellow prisoner, Leo K. Thorsness, recounted in a memoir. “He went around the cell pointing to each of us individually,” Mr. Thorsness continued. “When the 42nd man said yes, it was unanimous. At that instant, Ned knew he would end up in the torture cells.”

The following Sunday, Commander Shuman, who died on Dec. 3 at 82, stepped forward to lead a prayer session and was quickly hustled away by guards. The next four ranking officers did the same, and they, too, were taken away to be beaten. Meanwhile, as Mr. Thorsness told it, “the guards were now hitting P.O.W.s with gun butts and the cell was in chaos.”

And then, he remembered, the sixth-ranking senior officer began, “Gentlemen, the Lord’s Prayer.”

“And this time,” he added, “we finished it.”

The guards had yielded.
That puts my Christmas issues into perspective.

Commander Shuman came home in March 1973 as part of a mass release of POWs. He retired from the Navy as a captain in 1984. His commendations included the Silver Star for his resistance while imprisoned. He died on Dec. 3, 2013, from complications of surgery on a leg he broke when he fell while preparing to hunt geese.

Quite a guy. We could use a lot more like him.

Merry Christmas and RIP to Captain Shuman and his shipmates.

Lt. Cmdr. Edwin A. Shuman III

Wednesday, December 25, 2013

A Ten-Month-Old’s Letter To Santa

Those of you who have lived through having small kids around (or grandkids - yes, OldNFO, I'm talking to you) will get a kick out of this.

A Ten-Month-Old’s Letter To Santa
Dear Santa,

 I am a ten-month-old baby and I write because my mother has been sending out my “Christmas List” to people, and her list does not in any way represent the things I really want.  I could give two s#*ts about receiving stacking cups.
Go to the link to read the rest. Good stuff!

Once again, Merry Christmas to all.

Merry Christmas 2013

Now more than ever, my sincerest wish for you and yours:

Peace on Earth. Good Will towards Men.

May it come true this year.

Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Twas The Night Before Christmas

Hope Santa is good to you tonight...

FOD - Tuesday Edition 2013.12.24

obama has fled inhospitable D.C. for the more welcoming environs of Hawaii. Here's what he was fleeing from.
The individual mandate, requiring the purchase of health insurance or paying a fine of 1 percent of annual income, is repealed for Americans who have had their plans canceled. The sudden change leaves some wondering whether the administration will enforce the individual mandate at all in 2014, including Chuck Todd this morning “If you put together all the different ways that they have delayed or grandfathered certain things in . . . I’m starting to wonder if anybody is ever going to pay the penalty in the first year. Is there going to be a single person that is going to be responsible for paying that $95? At this point it doesn’t look like it.” (Note that the fine is $95 or 1 percent of your income, whichever amount is higher.)

CBS News: “Teresa Fryer, the chief information security officer for the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services (CMS), told congressional interviewers that she explicitly recommended denial of the website’s Authority to Operate (ATO), but was overruled by her superiors. The website was rolled out amid warnings Fryer said she gave both verbally and in a briefing that disclosed ‘high risks’ and possible exposure to ‘attacks’.”

A growing consensus finds the Obama administration’s NSA policies indefensible: “From the moment the government’s massive database of citizens’ call records was exposed this year, U.S. officials have clung to two main lines of defense: The secret surveillance program was constitutional and critical to keeping the nation safe. But six months into the controversy triggered by former NSA contractor Edward Snowden, the viability of those claims is no longer clear.”

In the Iran negotiations, “A bipartisan group of 26 senators introduced legislation Thursday that threatened new sanctions against Iran, dismissing warnings from the White House that such a move could scuttle efforts to peacefully resolve the dispute over Iran’s nuclear program.

According to a forecasting model from the Washington Post’s John Sides, “Democrats currently have a 1 percent chance of retaking the House.”
And that was just last week's headlines.

In other news, barry manned up and accepted responsibility for the fiasco that is obamacare - sort of.
Asked what was his biggest mistake of 2013, the President cited the website woes and accepted responsibility, saying: "Since I'm in charge, obviously we screwed it up."
A little problem with your prepositions, Mr. President...?

What a loser...

A Grim Reminder Of The Real World

Sadly, one of the students wounded in the recent shooting at Arapahoe High School in Colorado died Saturday.
Claire Davis, the 17-year-old high school senior shot by a classmate at their Colorado school, died Saturday at the hospital where she was being treated.

"It is with unspeakable sadness that we write and say that Claire has passed away from the gunshot wound she received at Arapahoe High School on December 13," her family said in a statement posted on the Facebook account of Littleton Adventist Hospital.
Surprisingly, the left hasn't followed its usual pattern of attempting to build political capital while wallowing in the blood of victims. One reason might be that the shooter was once again a loon with leftist-leaning views, a fact that went unreported by most mainstream media outlets. (Go here for a list of "the media's history of convenient speculation and outright lies when it comes to the perpetrators of violence."

But perhaps the main reason for the muted media reporting is that the attack was stopped 80 seconds after it began by an armed campus 'resource officer' - politically correct code words for a good guy with a gun.
Did you know that the latest left-winger who decided to shoot up a local school was stopped in 80 seconds by an armed security guard? Few do because the media refuses to focus on this fact.

Arapaho High School shooter Karl Pierson was loaded up for a long shooting spree when he entered his high school at about 12:30 on December 13. But it was all over in seconds resulting in this admitted communist shooting himself when he was confronted by an armed Arapahoe County Sheriff’s officer. The sheriff was employed by the school as its Student Resource Officer.

The media isn’t focusing much on the true facts in this story because it doesn’t fit its narrative.

But the fact is the shooter was a left-wing criminal and was stopped by a man with a gun!
As the NRA suggests, this would seem to support the assertion that staffing schools with armed personnel helps minimize, or even prevent, attacks of this nature.
The National Rifle Association says the Arapahoe High School shooting is proof that an "armed response" to school massacres — putting more "good guys with guns" in schools — works, and that Colorado's new gun control laws, passed in the wake of the 2012 theater massacre in Aurora, did nothing to keep guns "out of the hands of bad guys."

"Gun control laws didn't stop a possible massacre at Arapahoe High School," the NRA's Institute for Legislative Action wrote in a letter to its members on Friday. "A good guy with a gun stopped the rampage and in doing so almost certainly prevented much greater harm. For that, we can all be thankful."

"The attacker's mission was stopped short by the quick response of an armed deputy sheriff who was working as a resource officer at the school," the letter continued. "Upon learning of the threat, the deputy ran from the cafeteria to the library, yelling for people to get down and identifying himself as a deputy sheriff.  The horrific incident lasted only a total of 80 seconds and ended with the shooter turning his gun on himself in the library as the deputy was closing in on him."
Arguing gun control is like arguing religion. The odds of changing anyone's mind are slim. But hopefully people on both sides can agree on one thing: this was a terrible event that has brought tragedy into the lives of two families - the victim's, and the shooter's.

Please pray for them both.

Monday, December 23, 2013

And So It Begins - Christmas Edition

Like most families, we have several Christmas traditions. One of them involves my wife spending a couple of days in a floury frenzy in the kitchen, baking all sorts of goodies for our friends and neighbors. However, in our case most of those goodies involve liquor in one form or another.

So while I was camped out in my easy chair watching football this weekend, she threw herself in an orgy of vegetable oil, eggs, milk, vanilla extract, sugar, chocolate, and other yummies. (Trust me, it's not as erotic as it sounds.)

Anyway, we spent today driving around delivering plates of said yummies to folks in the area. Given that it's Christmas, and given the hospitable nature of the people around here, we were invited in more than once for a glass of wine. Given our nature, we gladly accepted.

Now we're back home for a brief respite, before heading out again for a party. It's a tough life...

Tomorrow is another family tradition. My wife and I wrap presents while sipping guzzling egg nog.

The day after that, of course, is Christmas. That's the day we engage in yet another family tradition - drinking to excess to help us deal with the influx of relatives, some of whom we are thrilled to see (drink to celebrate) and some of whom we merely put up with once a year (drink to tolerate).

As a public service, here's a couple of hints to help you deal with the excesses experienced during this time of the year.

Avoid liver injury and drink milk with your Christmas schnapps
Christmas parties – accompanied by Christmas ale and schnapps – can lead to a severe headache the following day. No matter how bad the discomfort, however, it does not take long to recover. The injury caused to the liver following years of alcohol abuse is much more serious.

In a recent study published in the journal Hepatology, researchers at Aarhus University – in collaboration with colleagues at the Saitama Medical School (Japan) and the Mount Sinai School of Medicine (New York) – showed that the protein osteopontin can counteract liver injury caused by alcohol abuse.

Osteopontin naturally occurs in many parts of the body, but is present in particularly high concentrations in milk. Osteopontin has a stimulating effect on the immune system, and it is therefore extracted by the dairy industry for use in products such as infant formulae.

“In a previous study, we fed mice with a high alcohol diet, supplemented with osteopontin corresponding to the content in milk. These mice did not suffer the same liver injury as those given the same alcohol diet without the osteopontin supplement,” says Associate Professor Esben Skipper Sørensen, Coordinator of the Section for Molecular Nutrition, Aarhus University.
If you're lactose intolerant, don't despair. You have alternatives.

Can I prepare my liver for Christmas parties?
The liver, the body's largest solid organ, is responsible for detoxifying many of the potentially harmful substances that can pollute the body.

The cornerstone of any liver-friendly programme is a diet that makes relatively light work for this organ. The diet should contain an abundance of fresh fruits and vegetables.

Not only do these foods tend not to tax and stress the liver, they also contain an abundance of nutrients such as vitamin C and carotenoids (e.g. beta-carotene) which can support liver function.

Foods that contain artificial additives such as sweeteners, colourings, flavourings and preservatives should be also be minimised in the diet.

Drinking plenty of water (about one and-a-half to two litres a day) should also help to reduce toxicity in your body and help take the load off your liver.

In addition, you might also benefit from taking something to 'strengthen' your liver. Perhaps most widely used as a general liver tonic is the herb Milk thistle. This herb has a traditional use that dates back more than 2000 years.

The herb contains a complex of bioflavonoid molecules known collectively as silymarin. Silymarin appears to have the ability to protect the liver cells by reducing the take-up and enhancing the removal of harmful toxins.

I recommend you take 200 mg of standardised extract of Milk thistle, twice a day, throughout the festive season.
You're welcome...

FOD 2013.12.23

In keeping with the spirit of the season, I bring tidings of comfort and joy to non-democrats. Well, I don't actually bring them. They come to us courtesy of barack obama and his gift that just keeps on giving - obamacare.

obamacare may be a gift to GOP politicians, but it's a lump of coal in America's stocking.
The mess that is Obamacare is a gift to Republicans, and one that can’t be returned...

No amount of holly and mistletoe will make up for the bad news most Americans are hearing, and will continue to hear, about their healthcare insurance...

Like an Advent calendar, Obamacare reveals a new wonder almost every day...
The most recent, of course, was the announcement that obama was granting "hardship" exemptions from obamacare's individual mandate to people whose policies had been cancelled because of obamacare - "the “hardship,” in this case, being ObamaCare itself."
The president’s “fixes” for the law he now acknowledges is creating “hardship” are intended to relieve that hardship, but the sheer number of them and the confusion they cause are going to limit their effect.

Do you need to comply with ObamaCare? Well, that depends on which part of the “law” you’re referring to and also on Obama’s mood, for in his mind, he is the state. Health-care hardship for millions, economic disarray, the redefinition of executive power to include the whims of the president–ObamaCare’s legacy grows more troubling by the day.
If you're interested in the gory details of barry's "improvisational approach" to impementing obamacare, here's links to two very good articles on the subjcet.
Insurance Mandate, 'Unaffordable' Exchanges

Obamacare Is Falling Apart Before Our Eyes
But rather than flay the liar-in-chief and his bumbling stooges with the thousand knives of detailed obamacare failures, I'd rather skewer him on the spit of ridicule. Take three minutes to watch the video below. If the obama administration was half this clever and professional obamacare would be up and running by now.

Sunday, December 22, 2013


One more comment on the Phil Robertson controversy:

Why do the liberals pillory Phil for his comments regarding homosexuality, but remain silent about the brutal actions taken by muslims against gays?

I Want One...

... and I wouldn't mind having the weapon either.

Phil Wasn't The First

Rather than getting all pompous and righteous about the Phil Robertson flap, I'd rather laugh at the whole thing, starting with a couple of jokes from a recent Mark Steyn article.
Bob Hope, touring the world in the year or so after the passage of the 1975 Consenting Adult Sex Bill:
“I’ve just flown in from California, where they’ve made homosexuality legal. I thought I’d get out before they make it compulsory.”
Dean Martin and Frank Sinatra kept this one in the act for a quarter-century. On stage, Dino used to have a bit of business where he’d refill his tumbler and ask Frank, “How do you make a fruit cordial?” And Sinatra would respond, “I dunno. How do you make a fruit cordial?” And Dean would say, “Be nice to him.”
Can you imagine the brouhaha that would ensue today if some entertainer told those jokes?

Speaking of Phil Robertson and homosexuals...

Now to offend other special interest groups:
There was a four car accident yesterday in Mexico - 87 died.

School is like a boner. It’s long and hard… unless you’re Asian.

Make the little things count. Teach midgets math.

If women ruled the world there would be no wars. Just a bunch of jealous countries not talking to each other.
A dyslexic walks into a bra...

An Irishman walks out of a bar...
Did I leave anyone out...?

Sunday Funnies 2013.12.22

It's Christmas time! Ho Ho Ho...

"The Rockefeller Center's Christmas tree is being put in place this afternoon. They bring it in and hoist it with a crane and steel cables. It's the same way they get Chris Christie into his pants." --David Letterman

"The other night they had that Christmas in Washington holiday special. And you know, people in Washington, right away the bickering started. Lou Dobbs accused Santa of using illegal immigrant labor. Rush Limbaugh said the gifts were part of some kind of socialist give away program. The AFL-CIO claims that Santa underpays his elves, and of course, since it's Washington, you're not going to find three wise men and a virgin. So the whole thing was pretty much a disaster." –Jay Leno

"There are a lot of holiday parties coming up at the White House. Obama is getting ready to host the Administration's first Hanukkah party tomorrow. Kind of an embarrassing moment, though. Today, after they lit the menorah, Biden blew it out and made a wish." –Jimmy Fallon

"According to a recent poll, 22% of Americans now say, 'Happy Holidays.' The other 78% say, 'Feliz Navidad.'" –Jay Leno

"As they do every year, al-Qaida has threatened to disrupt and ruin Christmas. You know, we already have a group that disrupts and ruins Christmas every year. They're called relatives." –Jay Leno

"President Obama and the first lady say they will not be exchanging gifts this Christmas. Mrs. Obama says they used to, but she got tired of Barack promising big things and not delivering." –Conan O'Brien

Q:  What’s the difference between snowmen and snowladies ?
A:  Snowballs.

Q:  Why are women’s breasts like a train set a kid gets at Christmas time ?
A:  Because they were originally intended for children but the father wants to play with them.

Q:  Why did the snowman have a smile on his face?
A:  Because the snowblower was coming down the block.

"I was so poor growing up, if I hadn't been a boy I'd have had nothing to play with on Christmas Day." -- Rodney Dangerfield
We were so poor when I was a child that at Christmas we exchanged glances.

I always get my loved ones petrol-soaked fake moustaches for Christmas. It’s such a joy to watch their faces light up!

I’ve just got my son a flat piece of cardboard for Christmas. Although what he wants with an ex box I’ll never know.

Saturday, December 21, 2013

Public Service Announcement

I'm sure that many of you will be attending one or more Christmas parties this weekend. If you are, please take heed of the following notice.

Last Minute Gift Ideas

Looking for just the right Christmas present for that special someone in your life? Well, as a public service, we here at Bergheim Follies have a couple of suggestions that are sure to please.

The first is for all you guys who like to spend time outdoors with your sweetie. It's a dancer's pole that mounts on your vehicle's trailer hitch. And it's on sale!!!

The Platinum Stage Hitch Pole is the worlds only dancer pole that can be attached to the ball hitch of any truck or SUV. The Hitch Stage has a 3 foot x 3 foot platform that floats approximately 5 feet from the ground and has approximately 7 feet of usable pole. The Hitch Pole frame and stage is made of the highest quality steel which allows it to support to 200lbs. The pole is available in genuine high polished stainless steel and genuine high polished brass, it is also available in a 1.75 inch or 2.0 inch diameter. The pole also breaks down into two pieces which allows it to fit in any size car.

If public displays of affection aren't your thing, here's something a little more intimate. Treat yourself or someone you care about with the gift that keeps on giving - membership in a vibrator of the month club.
Surprise your loved one with a unique romantic gift every month! Each month a new gift arrives, delighting the recipient.  A custom gift message card  from you may be included with the first month's gift.
It'll be Christmas-time all year round.

Batteries not included.

And don't forget the wrapping paper...

Friday, December 20, 2013

Friday Follies Happy Hour 2013.12.20

A two-fer today...

The first one is in memory of Ray Price, country music great who passed away earlier this week.

The second is one of my all-time favorite Christmas songs.

Ho Ho Ho...

Life In God's Country - Local Politics Version

Reason #287 Why I Love Living In The Texas Hill Country
Democratic candidates are a rarity in the Hill Country, and that longstanding political fact was freshly illustrated by party primary filings of those seeking election next November to county posts there.

Nary a Democrat declared for local races in Kerr, Gillespie, Kendall, Bandera and Comal counties.
I'm proud to say I live in one of those counties.
“It's hard to get people to run if they know they're going to lose just because you're a Democrat,” said Brenda Harrison, Democratic Party chairwoman in Kerr County, where only two Democrats have run locally in the past decade, both unsuccessfully.

“There's just not enough Democrats for anybody to get elected to a countywide office in these hills out here,” agreed Fred Mabry, the Democratic Party chairman in Bandera County.
That's because most folks out here take education seriously, work for a living, and don't collect welfare or food stamps. We also hunt, fish, and help our neighbors who need it. Contrast that with the values of democrat strongholds such as Detroit or Chicago.*

(H/T Doug Ross)

Republicans see their strong presence in the Hill Country as an endorsement of their party's platform and values, which they say has grown despite a Democrat occupying the White House.
“A lot of people in the rural areas don't support Obama, and that deters people from the Democratic Party,” said Spencer Yeldell, communications director for the Republican Party of Texas.
That's because we're racists...
It's even been tough finding a landlord willing to rent property for campaign offices, (Robbi Boone, Democratic Party chairwoman in Comal County) said.
That's because landlords don't want to incur the added expense of fumigating the property after the democrats move out.

* In all seriousness, this part of Texas was settled in the mid-1800s by a group of Germans known as the Freethinkers. Their influence was profound in establishing the area's philosophical underpinnings and values - it's Weltanschauung (a particular philosophy or view of life; the worldview of an individual or group). Those traits have been passed down through the generations and still are strongly held by many today.
Between the years 1845 and 1860, a large contingent of German Freethinkers immigrated to the Texas Hill Country. Unlike the thousands of Adelsverein-sponsored German farmers immigrating to the United States and Texas to escape overpopulation and economic problems, the Freethinkers, being ardent advocates of democracy and freedom from religion, were fleeing primarily from political and religious tyranny. They came to the United States seeking freedom from dictatorial monarchies and clerics.

The Freethinkers refused to accept political absolutism and the authority of a church, religion, or its supposedly inspired scripture...

Besides being well educated, many of the Freethinkers had been quite affluent while living in the German states. When they immigrated to Texas, they brought with them not only clothes and guns, but books, linens, china, paintings, musical instruments, and especially, a new philosophy. As a matter of survival, these intellectuals rapidly engaged in the effort to master the art of pioneer farming. For this endeavor, they drew on the expertise of the Comanches and some local Mormons who taught them how to raise the crops best suited for the Texas climate and soil.

They quickly learned to clear land; build cabins, cabinets, wagons, and fences; cut trees; split shingles; shoe horses; distill wine; roll cigars; hunt and fish; and raise corn, cotton, tobacco and cattle. However, their time was divided between fields and education. Higher ideals, classics, and cultural affairs were studied, discussed, and debated. Their children early on were schooled in these areas.

Education was of paramount importance to these intellectual immigrants. They built schools and libraries which also served for defense against occasional renegade Indian attacks. They educated their children to be independent and self-reliant, and with minds free from prejudice. They strongly encouraged a skeptical outlook on the pronouncement of others in their own study of right and truth. Very important in their education was the development of a spirit which would sustain the courage of their convictions without regard to personal consequences. Girls, as well as boys, were strongly encouraged to pursue their highest potential level of aptitude. (emphasis added)
The Texas Hill Country is a beautiful place, both spiritually and visually. I can't imagine living anywhere else.

Thursday, December 19, 2013

Santas Behaving Badly

It's that time of the year again, when Santa Claus is in the news. Most of the time he behaves as a good role model should, but on occasion he gets a little out of hand.

Booze-soaked Santas have some New Yorkers seeing red
Bar-goers dressed in Christmas-themed costumes descended upon hundreds of cities worldwide Saturday for the annual bar crawl known as Santacon.

In New York, thousands took to the streets dressed as elves, Santas and holiday-themed characters, as they have since 1997. In recent years, the debauchery of some of its participants has become too much -- even for some who take part in it.

"It was just terrible, they were throwing up in the streets. It was really just disgusting..."

Despite the controversy, city officials are supporting the event.

"It's what makes New York New York," Police Commissioner Ray Kelly said at a press conference Friday.
That's what makes New York New York - a horde of drunks dressed up as mythical characters?

Oh well, if I lived in NYC I'd drink heavily too.

Revelers dressed as Santa Claus pose for a picture at Tompkins Square Park during the annual NYC Santacon

At least none of those Santas dressed like this one.

Although it sounds like some of them may have ended up like this.

In other Christmas news, we have this sad story.

Man Leaps To His Death At Shopping Mall After Girlfriend Insists On More Shopping
A 38-year-old man leaped to his death after an argument with his girlfriend who insisted they continue shopping. CCTV captured Tao Hsiao and his girlfriend in a mall in Xuzhou, Jiangsu province, east China where they had reportedly been shopping for five hours or so before he hit his limit.

Eyewitnesses said Hsiao could be heard telling his girlfriend that they already had more bags than they could carry, but she insisted on hitting one more store where there was a sale on shoes.

An eyewitness said: “He told her she already had enough shoes, more shoes that she could wear in a lifetime, and it was pointless buying any more. She started shouting at him, accusing him of being a skinflint, and of spoiling Christmas. It was a really heated argument.”

The argument continued until Hsiao threw the bags on the floor and himself over the balcony, dropping seven stories to his death and smashing Christmas decorations on the way down. He was killed on impact.
When I first read this I thought it was a joke, but as near as I can tell it's a legitimate story. I feel bad for the guy and his family, and I hesitate to make light of this tragedy, but at the same time I know what he went through. Like most guys, at one time or another I've been dragged along on a seemingly interminable shopping trip. But rather than leap to my death, I just found the nearest bar and hunkered down for the duration.


Follow-Up #1

Yesterday I posted a short piece examining the mainstream media's attempt to sanitize the political ideology of last week's high school shooter.

Today I ran across this list of "the media's history of convenient speculation and outright lies when it comes to the perpetrators of violence."

I'm not going to repost the whole thing - it is depressingly lengthy - but I will note that it is an excellent compilation illustrating the media's overwhelming bias and its desperate attempts to equate labels such as "conservative," "right wing," and of course "Tea Party" into synonyms for "violent," "despicable," and "psychopath."

Follow-Up #2

I also discussed Chuck Schumer's ridiculous position that we should cut veteran's benefits while preserving congressional pay and perks. It turns out that Chuckles isn't the only lunatic in the asylum known as the U.S. Senate.

The Ryan-Murray budget deal reduced spending by cutting retirement benefits for military retirees. Senator Jeff Sessions (R - Alabama) co-sponsored an amendment to repeal that provision of the deal. Even better, the amendment went on to close a loophole that enables illegal immigrants to bilk Uncle Sam of billions of dollars annually.

You'd think that would be a no-brainer, right?

Wrong again, politics-breath.

Democrats Prioritize Illegal Aliens Over Veterans
Sen. Jeff Sessions says a plan to cut retirement benefits for military retirees should be replaced with one to ensure billions of dollars of tax credits aren’t paid to illegal immigrants each year…

Those cuts [to military retirement benefits] could be avoided, Sessions said, by fixing a loophole that allows people in the country illegally to receive IRS payments through the Additional Child Tax Credit.

The Treasury Inspector General for Tax Administration has called on Congress to close the loophole that allows for average payments of about $1,800, even if the recipient has paid no taxes.

Federal law bars illegal immigrants from collecting tax benefits, like the Earned Income Tax Credit, that can be claimed by residents with Social Security numbers. However, the child tax credit provision does not require a tax return to include a Social Security number, allowing the ACTC to be claimed by illegal immigrants.

According to a 2011 report by the Treasury Inspector General for Tax Administration, millions of people without valid Social Security numbers received a total of $4.2 billion in ACTC in 2010 – up from $924 million in 2005. The IRS is expected to issue some $7.4 billion in ACTC payouts this year.
However, Harry Reid utilized an arcane senate rule to prevent amendments to the Ryan-Murray budget deal, effectively killing the Sessions amendment.
Prioritizing illegal aliens over military veterans: that tells you all you need to know about the Democratic Party.
Words cannot express my disgust with people like that.

Wednesday, December 18, 2013


George Orwell is alive and well, and editing the Denver Post.

Orwell, of course, was the British author who wrote Nineteen Eighty-Four. In that classic, he introduced Newspeak, "a controlled language created by the totalitarian state as a tool to limit freedom of thought, and concepts that pose a threat to the regime..."

Evidently the Denver Post considers truth to be an enemy of the gun-control aims of the current regime we are suffering under.

Newspaper Removes 'Socialist' Description of Accused Arapahoe High School Shooter
An article originally published at the Denver Post on Friday cited a classmate who described Karl Pierson, the alleged Arapahoe High School shooter, as a “very opinionated Socialist.” But the paper edited the article since it was first published, scrubbing the reference to socialism...

“Thomas Conrad, who had an economics class with the gunman, described him as a very opinionated Socialist,” the Post originally said.

But in a move reminiscent of George Orwell’s “1984,” the description was removed.

The article now says: "Thomas Conrad, who had an economics class with Pierson, described him as very opinionated."
Would the paper have made the same change if the shooter was described as "a very opinionated Conservative"?

I think we all know the answer to that one...

* Also from Nineteen Eighty-Four, "thoughtcrime is the criminal act of holding unspoken beliefs or doubts that oppose or question the ruling party."

We obviously don't have to worry about the MSM committing thoughtcrime.

Holiday Challenges

This time of the year we're all bombarded with sob stories about people who have fallen on hard times, who are struggling to provide a Merry Christmas for their loved ones, or who are otherwise having difficulty during what should be the happiest time of the year.

Well, this one is no different - with one exception. The people profiled in this story are those who have chosen to willingly make sacrifices for the greater good. And they are struggling through no fault of their own.
Under Obama, troops forced to rely on welfare, holiday charity to make ends meet

Jamie Boling and her husband, Joseph, know that providing for a military family can be trying — waiting for orders, often living on a single income, and, in especially tough cases, supporting a spouse wounded in the line of duty.

Around the holidays, the challenges — especially the financial ones — can tax families already struggling to make ends meet.

The Center on Budget and Policy Priorities, a nonprofit D.C.-based think tank, estimates that as many as 340,000 veterans rely on federal or state rental assistance. About 900,000 veterans live on food stamps, and an additional 5,000 active-duty service members are food stamp recipients.
When I entered the Army in 1972 I was an E-1 with a wife and child. My base pay was $288 per month, with an additional quarters allowance of $105 monthly (no, I didn't remember that - I looked it up). Even way back then that amount was so low we qualified for food stamps. That was the only way we could make ends meet - at least until we reached our 'permanent' station and my wife could get a job.
The nonprofit groups Operation Homefront and Fisher House Foundation stepped in Monday to provide the Bolings and about 300 other military families in the D.C. area with grocery bags filled with the fixings for a holiday meal.
FWIW, I did a little research on both groups, and they appear to be worthwhile charities. If you have a little spare change (doubtful, I know, during this time of the year, but maybe...) toss some their way.
“The No. 1 request we hear is for assistance with food and to ensure children have a Christmas to remember,” said Vivian Dietrich, executive director of the D.C. area branch of Operation Homefront. “Families want to ensure their children have pleasant holidays.”

For the first time in 30 years, amid budget pressures from the sequester and an ongoing financial downturn, Congress and the military are considering changes that could cut soldiers’ retirement benefits.

And President Obama has suggested the possibility of paring back annual military pay raises, from 1.8 percent to 1 percent.

Vivian Greentree, director of research and policy for the advocacy group Blue Star Families, said the developments could seriously impact the finances of soldiers and their loved ones.

“We know military families face unique financial concerns that come with the military lifestyle,” she said. “For the thousands of military families living in poverty, the impact of frequent moves and cuts to military family programming or service member compensation will be felt even more keenly.”
Don't give me any crap about the hardships faced by welfare queens or EBT leeches. Save your sympathy for those who deserve it ... and that most definitely does not include congresscritters, contrary to what Chuck Schumer (D - Asshole) said.
Schumer: Veterans — Not Congress — Must Face Budget Cuts

It's time for retired veterans to face cuts as the federal government looks for ways to trim expenditures, Sen. Chuck Schumer said Monday.

"Civilian federal employees have been cut, cut, cut. I think there was a feeling, if you're going to cut them further, which was done, that the military retirees should have about an equal amount. It's small," the New York Democrat told MSNBC's "Morning Joe."

But Schumer maintained members of Congress should not be forced to take a pay cut. He said they have already sacrificed, since they have not seen a pay raise "in a long time," and explained most of them are paying more for healthcare insurance.

"We have taken pretty big cuts," he said.
Poor babies...

Remind me again about how much Schumer and his fellow assholes have sacrificed to serve their country. And what they get in return for their 'service.'

I repeat: they are assholes of the first degree! Over-paid pampered worthless assholes who cause far more problems than they solve. Pardon my French, but fuck 'em all!!!

Worthless Goddamn bastards...