Wednesday, September 17, 2014

PSAs

Because I'm bazy (busy and lazy) today's post is a mixture of Public Service Announcements and in-box clutter.

Enjoy...

The Real Reason obama is taking action against ISIS.



Speaking of golf, here's a little compare-and-contrast for you.


 
 And speaking of ISIS, here are three great reasons to fight back against ISIS.



Economics 101: Who does a better job spending money - you, or the government?



In case of emergency boil your water ... carefully.



Hunting and Fishing Tips
I went fishing this morning but after a short time I ran out of worms. Then I saw a cottonmouth with a frog in his mouth.

Frogs are good bass bait.

Knowing the snake couldn't bite me with the frog in his mouth I grabbed him right behind the head, took the frog, and put it in my bait bucket.

Now the dilemma was how to release the snake without getting bitten. I grabbed my bottle of Jack Daniels and poured a little whiskey in its mouth.

His eyes rolled back, he went limp. I released him into the lake without incident and carried on my fishing using the frog.

A little later, I felt a nudge on my foot.

There was that same snake with two frogs in his mouth.

One day two buddies, Chester and Earl, can't decide whether or not to go out duck hunting.

Chester says to Earl "I'll just send my dog out to see if there are any ducks out in the pond. If there aren't many ducks out there, I'm not going hunting". So he sends the dog out to the pond.

The dog comes back and barks twice. Chester says "Well I'm not going to go out. He only saw two ducks out there".

Earl says "You're going to take the dog's barks for the truth?" Earl doesn't believe it, so he goes to look for himself. When he gets back he says "I don't believe it. There really are only two ducks out there! Where did you get that dog?" Chester says "Well, I got him from the breeder up the road. If you want one, you can get one from him".

So Earl goes to the breeder and says he wants a dog like the one his friend Chester has. The breeder obliges and Earl brings the dog home, tells it to go out and look for ducks. Minutes later the dog returns with a stick in its mouth and starts humping Earl's leg furiously.

Outraged, Earl takes the dog back to the breeder and says "This dog is a fraud. I want my money back!" The breeder asks Earl what the dog did. So Earl tells him that when he sent the dog out to look for ducks, it came back with a stick in its mouth and started humping his leg.

The breeder says "Earl, dogs can't talk. He was trying to tell you there are more fucking ducks out there than you can shake a stick at".

Okay, this one really is serious. Please pay attention for 3 minutes and 46 seconds.

2 comments:

Old NFO said...

Yeah, the other thing is they video you at the ATM...

CenTexTim said...

I rarely use ATMs anymore. The store where I buy groceries lets me get cash back with a debit card at no charge. The keypad has a very tight shield around it, so I'm not worried about videoing my PIN. IR, on the other hand, could be a problem.