SOTU Prequel

Tonight is something we've been looking forward to for a whole year. Yes, folks, it's time for obama's State of the Union (SOTU) address.

People are making predictions about what he will say, suggesting bingo games to make the speech more palatable, even serving up rules for a drinking game (massive quantities of booze are about the only way to get through this thing).

I don't want to be left out of the fun, but I also don't want to go along with the crowd. So here's a little different slant on how to get in the proper frame of mind for the crapstorm looming on the horizon.

Predictions:

     - Obama will announce his plan for Social Security: "Take the security part out of it."

     - After the speech a drunk will call the White House and tell the receptionist, "I'd like to become the next President of the United States."

       The receptionist says, "What are you, an idiot?"

       The drunk responds, "Why, is it required?"


Observations:

     - Isn't it interesting how most of the people who hate the rich buy lottery tickets?

     - The Union is in a truly dismal state.

But with the president delivering his State of the Union speech to Congress Tuesday night, let’s pause here to take as hard look at the real state of America, by the numbers, using only cold, hard facts.

Entertainment:

This is a little dated, but still hilarious. It comes with two cautions: (1) NSFW; and (2) be careful when drinking beverages. You will spew.



So stock up on adult beverages, remove all breakable and throwable objects from reach, and watch as much of it as you can stand (for me, that'll be about 15 nanoseconds).

Then find a rerun of Law and Order...