Quick Hits

Being on vacation in a somewhat technologically-challenged location often results in one being behind the rest of the world. I had a chance to catch up today and found the following worthy of note.

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Sadly, but not surprisingly, Attorney General Eric Holder has again revealed himself to be a racist. This time, he demonstrates the racism of lower expectations when the DOJ forced the Dayton police department to lower entrance requirements so more minorities would pass the exam.

Specifically, the Department of Justice found that the Dayton police department had too few African-Americans...because not enough of them could pass the basic entrance exams. It wasn't exactly a lofty bar: there are two tests, and passing only required scores of 66% and 72%...until Holder got involved and ordered them to lower the bar. Now, applicants can get in with scores of 58% and 63%, which previously would have been an "F" and a "D." The policy change is so ludicrous, even the head of Dayton's NAACP is saying it's a bad idea and refuses to support it.

Insight and further commentary supplied by Stilton Jarlsberg at Hope 'n Change.

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Remember New Orleans after Katrina? Or just about any major disaster in the U.S. and elsewhere. One of the things that invariably occurs in the aftermath is widespread looting. So why is there no looting in Japan after the earthquake? My admittedly unscientific opinion, based on nothing other than the fact I lived there for three years, is that the Japanese culture embeds respect for tradition, order, and others in its citizens.

What does that say about us? (H/T to BMEWS for the link.)

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We've all seen those cheesy photo spreads of shapely models posing suggestively with a snake wrapped around them. I don't find them appealing, but I guess enough people do so that they continue to appear. Well, in a 'news of the absurd' sort of way comes this twist on man-bites-dog.

It should have been an alluring photoshoot between two of nature's beautiful creatures as a model wrapped herself in a snake.

But surgically enhanced Israeli model Orit Fox got more than she bargained for when the massive boa constrictor took objection to her over familiarity and reacted by biting into her breast.

However, it was the snake who came off worse because, while Ms Fox need a tetanus shot in hospital, the reptile later died from silicone poisoning.

Full story and pictures here.

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Finally, from Peter we have a link to the following story.

Always leave 'em laughing...

We've all had trouble with our animals, but I don't think anyone can top this one:

Calling in sick to work makes me uncomfortable. No matter how legitimate my excuse, I always get the feeling that my boss thinks I'm lying.

On one recent occasion, I had a valid reason but lied anyway, because the truth was just too darned humiliating. I simply mentioned that I had sustained a head injury, and I hoped I would feel up to coming in the next day. By then, I reasoned, I could think up a doozy to explain the bandage on the top of my head. The accident occurred mainly because I had given in to my wife's wishes to adopt a cute little kitty.

Initially, the new acquisition was no problem.

Then one morning, I was taking my shower after breakfast when I heard my wife, Deb, call out to me from the kitchen.

"Honey! The garbage disposal is dead again. Please come reset it."

"You know where the button is," I protested through the shower pitter-patter and steam. "Reset it yourself!"

"But I'm scared!", she persisted. "What if it starts going and sucks me in?" There was a meaningful pause and then, "C'mon, it'll only take you a second?" So out I came, dripping wet and butt naked, hoping that my silent outraged nudity would make a statement about how I perceived her behavior as extremely cowardly.

Sighing loudly, I squatted down and stuck my head under the sink to find the button. It is the last action I remember performing.

It struck without warning, and without any respect to my circumstances. No, it wasn't the hexed disposal, drawing me into its gnashing metal teeth. It was our new kitty, who discovered the fascinating dangling objects she spied hanging between my legs. She had been poised around the corner and stalked me as I reached under the sink. And, at the precise moment when I was most vulnerable, she leaped at the toys I unwittingly offered and snagged them with her needle-like claws. I lost all rational thought to control orderly bodily movements, blindly rising at a violent rate of speed, with the full weight of a kitten hanging from my masculine region.

Wild animals are sometimes faced with a "fight or flight" syndrome. Men, in this predicament, choose only the "flight" option. I know this from experience. I was fleeing straight up into the air when the sink and cabinet bluntly and forcefully impeded my ascent. The impact knocked me out cold!

When I awoke, my wife and the paramedics stood over me. Now there are not many things in this life worse than finding oneself lying on the kitchen floor butt naked in front of a group of "been-there, done-that" paramedics.

Even worse, having been fully briefed by my wife, the paramedics were all snorting loudly as they tried to conduct their work, all the while trying to suppress their hysterical laughter......and not succeeding.

Somehow I lived through it all. A few days later I finally made it back in to the office, where colleagues tried to coax an explanation out of me about my head injury. I kept silent, claiming it was too painful to talk about, which it was. "What's the matter?" They all asked, "Cat got your tongue?"

If they only knew!