Sunday Funnies 2012.12.16

My wife dragged me out Christmas shopping yesterday. Every store we went to was packed. In the crowd and confusion we somehow got separated. My wife got quite upset because 'we' (she) had a lot of shopping to do, so she pulled out her cell phone and called me, demanding to know where I was.

In a calm voice, I said, "Honey, you remember the jewelry store we went into about five years ago where you fell in love with that diamond necklace that we could not afford and I told you that I would get it for you one day?"

There was a slight pause, and then in a softer, choked-up voice she replied, "Yes, I remember that jewelry store. Don't tell me..."

I said, "Well, I'm in the bar right next to it."

The economy is tough this year. How tough is it?

We bought the kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying "Toys not included."

Christmas is the season when you buy this year's gifts with next year's money.

Oh, for the good old days when we would stop Christmas shopping when we ran out of money.

Christmas shopping is a race to see which gives out first - your money or your feet.