Sunday Funnies 2016.04.10

We had a very nice weekend in College Station watching our son get his Aggie class ring. That was the highlight of the trip, but yesterday's breakfast came a close second.

We were staying at the local Sheraton. They had a breakfast buffet in the lobby. I wandered down there not expecting much. I figured it would be the usual - a choice of cereal, yogurt, fruit, breads and sweets, alongside cold eggs and bacon sitting in a puddle of grease. At first glance that's what it looked like - but then I got closer. They had my favorite breakfast food - and possibly the unhealthiest meal on the planet - biscuits and cream gravy with sausage bits.

I loaded up on that, then just for kicks added a couple of quite tasty pork sausage patties and some very nicely done bacon on the side.

My wife looked up from her fruit and yogurt, tsk-tsked, muttered something about increasing my life insurance, and took a sip of coffee.

I got seconds.

Mmm, mmm, good!

A couple of strips of bacon and a fried egg walk into a bar.

The bartender says,” Sorry, but we don’t serve breakfast here!”

 What makes biscuits and gravy such a good breakfast is the nap you take an hour after eating it

A guy walks into a doctor’s office. He has sausage coming out of one ear, bacon coming out of his other ear, and a biscuit coming out of his nose. He says worriedly, ‘Doc, what’s wrong with me?’

The doctor replies, ‘You’re not eating properly.’

An angry wife meets her husband at the door. There is alcohol on his breath and lipstick on his cheek.

‘I assume,’ she snarls, ‘that there is a very good reason for you to come waltzing in at six o’clock in the morning?’

‘There is,’ he replies. ‘Breakfast.’

Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Omelette.
Omelette who?
Omelette smarter than I look.

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