The past few days have been ... interesting. I had to take a quick unexpected out-of-town trip Tues. through Thurs. Between travel and dealing with the issues that necessitated the trip I had little free time. I got home Thursday evening.
Friday I spent half the day in the ER, thanks to that trip. As a man of that certain age, I have for several years gotten up in the middle of the night to answer the call of nature.
I have the routine down pat - at least, at home. I can roll out of bed, stumble into the bathroom, and take care of business without fully awakening and without turning on the light. That's all well and good at home, but when one goes on the road that routine becomes treacherous.
In the middle of Wednesday night my subconscious roused me per usual. However, the floor plan of the hotel I was staying in differs from the floor plan of our bedroom at home. The consequences - face, meet door. Door, meet face.
Final outcome - Door 1, Face 0.
I ended up with a huge shiner, a swollen cheekbone and forehead, and a disturbing tendency to spit up the occasional mouthful of blood. In true guy fashion I washed down a couple of ibuprofen with a cold beer and went back to bed.
I finished up what I needed to do on Thursday. The swelling and bruising wasn't too bad, and the blood-spitting lessened, so I headed home.
Friday morning I woke up looking like I'd just gone 15 rounds with Mike Tyson. My wife took one look at me and ordered me to the ER. Of course, her compassion didn't extend to taking me there. She said something along the lines of 'you did it to yourself, now go take care of it.'
The milk of human kindness would curdle within that woman.
Anyway, after several hours of tests and a CAT scan, the verdict came back. Cosmetic damage only - structurally everything is sound. The only thing hurt was my pride.
And my wallet. Thanks to obamacare, my medical insurance co-pay for ER visits jumped from $35 to $150. Adding insult to injury (literally) the ER doc is a contract worker. His fee is not covered by the ER. Instead, he will submit a separate bill to the insurance company and whatever they don't cover will be billed to yours truly.
Thanks again, barry.
All in all, though, things could have been worse. I really clobbered myself, and am lucky to escape with, and I quote from the ER Discharge Summary. "Facial and scalp contusions. Head injury - no wake up."
I'm not sure what that last phrase means...
1 day ago