Monday, August 20, 2012

My Home Away From Home

Well, here I am in the beautiful moderately attractive hellish city of Laredo. I'd forgotten how much I hate this place. There are a number of reasons.

It's not just hot - it's HOT! The average high down here for August is 101 F. Last night it was still in the 90s after 10:00 p.m. The sun is a physical presence. It literally beats you into submission. Forget doing anything outside. Just walking from my truck to my office leaves me sweating like a hooker in church.

This place is on the Texas-Mexico border. That means the vast majority of the people around here are Hispanic. Not that this is a problem per se, but there are some cultural differences between South Texas and Central Texas. For example, I went grocery shopping today. The store was full of large, heavyset women speaking Spanish, with swarms of under-school-age children in tow. The concept of staying to one side of the aisle and not blocking access to shelves or other parts of the store is unknown. Also unknown is the practice of putting shopping carts in their little corrals in the parking lot. It's evidently much more fun to let them roll loose and bang into other people's vehicles.

I'm used to living out in the country, with plenty of elbow room. Here I'm cooped up in a little one-bedroom apartment. The good news is that I have a corner unit on the top floor, so I don't hear too much noise from my immediate neighbors. The bad news is that I'm located right next to the pool, which attracts hordes of yelling screaming kids in the afternoon, and a plethora of loud drunks playing even louder music later in the evening. Fortunately they're pretty good about observing the 10:00 p.m. curfew during the week. Weekends, however, are a different matter. Thankfully I'm usually home then, so it doesn't affect me too much.

Today I got a serious case of cabin fever. I just had to get out and about, regardless of the heat. I decided to take a short hike along the Rio Grande. To my shock, I saw a member of Los Zetas, the Mexican drug cartel that controls these parts, trying to cross the river. He was struggling to stay afloat because of the large backpack of drugs that was strapped to his back. If he didn't get some help he would surely drown.

Being a responsible Texan and raised by my parents to help those in distress, I immediately notified local police, the Border Patrol, and the DEA.

It's now over an hour later and no one has responded. The unfortunate drug smuggler has drowned.

I'm starting to think I wasted three stamps...

2 comments:

Old NFO said...

Heh... Yep, wasted the stamps... stay safe down there!

Pascvaks said...

Doesn't Mexico have legal easements that have already held up in Mexican Courts that are honored by SCOTUS as a reciprical professional courtesy that say all of South Texas is Open Range? Well, what the hay, what is it that they always say is 9 points of the law?