What Do They Know?

Excerpts from an excellent piece of satire (H/T Power Line).

President Obama's approval rating of the American public has fallen to an all-time low...

Fewer than one in 10 Americans earned the president's favor, according to the president. That is down sharply from six in 10 — the percentage of Americans Obama approved of shortly after his election in November 2008, and the lowest level yet for his administration.

"They're not doing a very good job, frankly," said the president. "Most of them, I mean. Some are. But not many."

"What these numbers show, I think, is that the president has become increasingly disillusioned with the American public," said Trevor Gopnik, a professor of political science at Georgetown University.

"He's completely disgusted," said White House press secretary Jay Carney. "Which shouldn't be all that surprising, given the state of the economy, the high unemployment rate, and the fact that most Americans are, let's face it, fat lazy slobs. Go to a mall and look around if you don't believe me," said Carney.

The survey of the West Wing also found:

• Americans eat too much and don't get enough exercise, says First Lady Michelle Obama — a view echoed by her husband's administration. "Today, we outline a vision for the nation that requires parents, neighborhoods, the medical community, employers, schools and individuals to take a coordinated and comprehensive approach to combating overweight and obesity," said Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius last year.

• The public doesn't pay enough taxes. There are "things we need to pay for as a country," the president stressed.

Other results from the poll indicate that Americans are incapable of providing for their own medical care, insist on buying cars that are safe and comfortable instead of cars that get the highest gasoline mileage, smoke too much, harbor too many of the wrong attitudes, fail to volunteer at sufficient rates, are too greedy, do not separate their recyclables enough, and continue to cling to guns and religion despite being lectured to by their betters about the importance of doing otherwise.

 There's more at the original link. CenTexTim says "Check it out."