Let Me See Your Hands

We hereby present the sad saga of an innocent democrap who was victimized by an overly friendly “Asian with straight white teeth, a tattoo on her butt, and a Gucci bag.”

How do we know he's a democrap? He's a minority from NY who has filed a lawsuit claiming that he received an overpriced 'happy ending.' He's not suing because of the happy ending, but because he thinks he was unfairly taken advantage of.

... he was unaware that it was illegal to pay for sex and was inebriated when negotiating a $120 digital manipulation.

'It's not my fault.'

'I didn't know any better.'

... Hubert Blackman, 22, claimed he only expected to receive a lap dance, “like at strip clubs,” when he called Las Vegas Exclusive Personals. But according to Blackman, the escort ... proposed providing more, offering a hand job for $200. Though “drunk on Courvoisier,” Blackman “got her to drop it to $120.”

Well, maybe he's not a true democrap. If he was he would have negotiated the price up, not down.

Blackman, pictured above, maintains he did not know it was illegal in Las Vegas to pay for sexual acts.

As for his rationale in suing the escort service, Blackman said he believes the firm “engaged and encouraged misconduct and fraud acts” that constituted a “violation of corporation.”

While Blackman’s U.S. District Court complaint claims that he has suffered mental distress as a result of his escort interaction, that may be a pre-existing condition. The East Harlem resident said that he has previously been diagnosed with a “psychotic disorder,” but that it was not “really strong.”

Methinks he did have a pre-existing “psychotic disorder” that was, in fact, “really strong.”

Blackman reported “seeing things and hearing things,” but said that he has not been on medication for two years. Though he recently dropped out of community college because he “can’t concentrate,” Blackman said he hoped to return to school and eventually work in accounting or business.

Based on the above, I don't think he has much of a future in the private sector. He does, however, seem quite qualified for a government job...