From The Medical Front

They're doing amazing things with organ (wink, wink) transplants these days.

Good News: Dick Transplants Now Possible

Rejoice, peen-having members of this Earth: Doctors from University of Stellenbosch in South Africa successfully completed the world's first purported penis transplant—the patient has made a full recovery and "is sexually active."

The surgery was conducted last December on a 21-year-old man who suffered a botched circumcision as a teen.

Prof. Andre van der Merwe, head of the university's urology department, told Bloomberg that they were able to convince a family to donate a deceased relative's penis after devising "a penis-like appendage on the corpse using a leftover skin flap." "The family is much happier to send the body to the grave with something resembling a penis," van der Merwe said.

Let me get this straight (hah!). They sewed a dead guy's penis on the kid, then put a fake penis on the corpse. I don't think at that point the donor really cares.

Technically, NBC News points out, this is the medical community's second attempted penis transplant: A Chinese man underwent surgery in 2005, but asked to have the penis removed two weeks later "because of psychological problems experienced by him and his wife."

She probably got tired of trying to get things straight between them.

The good news is that now the patient can get laid. The bad news is that he'll have to wait two years.

Then he'll have to go to his dentist to get the smile removed from his face...