Sunday, July 8, 2012

Sunday Funnies 2012.07.08

The quote below is from a story in yesterday's San Antonio Express-News.
"The Fourth of July holiday signifies that college football is just around the corner."
For those of y'all that aren't aware of it, football in Texas isn't a sport. It's a religion. So here's a little humor to celebrate the beginning of football season in Texas.

The three most popular sports in Texas are high school football, college football, and professional football.

Three Texans, Slim, Billy-Bob and Bubba, died and went to heaven.

At the pearly gates, they were met by St. Peter, who explained that although it was late and God had retired for the evening, he had asked Albert Einstein to show them around so they wouldn't get bored before they met God in the morning.

After Einstein had introduced himself to Slim, he asked, "By the way, Slim, what was your IQ when you were alive?"

"159", said Slim.

"Great!", said Einstein. We'll discuss my general theory of relativity and maybe a little unified field theory as I show you around."

"What an exciting opportunity!", said Slim.

Einstein then introduced himself to Billy-Bob, and when he was done he said, "Tell me, Billy-Bob - what was your IQ when you were alive?"

"141", said Billy-Bob.

"Good," said Einstein. "If you'd like, we can discuss a little mathematics and philosophy as I point out the heavenly sights."

"Nothing I'd like better!" was Billy-Bob's reply.

After Einstein had introduced himself to Bubba, he asked, "What was your IQ when you were alive, Bubba?"

"78" said Bubba.

Punching him on the arm, Einstein said, "Hey, Bubba - How 'bout them Aggies!"

By the time Bubba arrived at the football game, the first quarter was almost over.

"Why are you so late?" his friend asked.

"I had to toss a coin to decide between going to church and coming to the game."

"How long could that have taken you?"

"Well, I had to toss it 14 times."

For those of you not familiar with the University of Texas, the picture below was taken during an ESPN pre-game show at the UT stadium. It features the iconic UT tower and a UT cheerleader.

And of course, no collection of football cartoons would be complete with the classic Lucy-Charlie Brown scene.

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