It’s a terrible thing to grow old alone. My wife hasn’t had a birthday for four years.
You know you're old when one of your friends is dating someone half their age and isn't breaking any laws.
You know you're old when many of your co-workers were born the same year that you got your last promotion.
Over the course of my life I've turned the pursuit of happiness into an endurance test.
My wife didn't know what to get me for my birthday, so one of her friends suggested she give me a certificate that says I can have one night of wild sex, any way I want it. My wife thought that was a great idea so she had a nice-looking certificate printed up and sealed in an envelope.
She gave it to me after dinner on my birthday. I read it, jumped up, yelled "This is the best birthday present ever!" and gave her a great big hug and kiss.
Then I grabbed my cars keys, ran for the door, and hollared "Don't wait up. I'll see you in the morning!"
She was not amused...
I LIKE the last one... :-)
ReplyDeleteYea NFO, it's nice alright.
ReplyDeleteBut just make sure when your birthday rolls around your wife isn't sitting across from you when you blow out the candles. ;)
OH, I forgot: Happy Birthday CTT.
ReplyDeleteNFO - me too!
ReplyDeleteToejam - thanks.
Happy Belated, Tim. You aren't one of those eternally young leap babies, are you?
ReplyDeleteThanks, Harper. No, I'm not a leap year baby (I was born in a leap year, but missed the magic day by two - 27th vs. 29th).
ReplyDeleteI have, however, been told that I'm eternally young ... or was that childish...?
Happy belated birthday. Mine is this weekend.
ReplyDelete29th birthday, no doubt... :-)
ReplyDeleteThanks and Congrats. Hope you enjoy yours as much as I enjoyed mine.