Thursday, January 31, 2013

What Your Kids Really Learn At College

Last night's post had a caveman-sex theme. This morning we're going to take the opposite approach - a higher education perspective on sex.

Public University Plans Event To help Female Students Achieve Orgasm
The University of Minnesota - Twin Cities (UMTC) is set to hold an event this spring designed to help its female undergraduate students achieve more and greater orgasms.

 The university’s official online description of the event entitled, “The Female Orgasm,” describes it as open to both male and female students.
" to..."

Snicker, snicker.
“Orgasm aficionados and beginners of all genders are welcome to come learn about everything from multiple orgasms to that mysterious G-spot,” reads the description posted on the school’s official events calendar.

“Whether you want to learn how to have your first orgasm, how to have better ones, or how to help you girlfriend, Kate and Marshall cover it all…” it adds.

“Are you coming?” it asks.
Well, at least they have a sense of humor.
The description of the event, which is hosted by the university’s Office of Diversity and Equity's Women's Center...
Of course. Who else but feminists would need a college course in how to find their happy place?

...does not say whether there is an age requirement.
Oh God, please make there be an age limit - say, greater than 18 and less than a well-preserved 50.
The program is costing the university $3,406 and is part of the university’s mission of “research”...
I couldn't find any mention of an admission fee or other charge for the event. So I assume the good taxpayers of the state of Minnesota are footing the bill for this orgasm-palozza.

A large part of my professional life involves conducting research. Obviously, however, I have been engaged in the wrong kind of research. I study strategic management issues related to information systems, which is interesting, but not nearly as much fun as studying orgasms.

Maybe it's time to change majors...

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Late Night Funnies

Too funny. When I saw this I just had to repost it ASAP. (From here.)

I Ain't Helping With The Dishes No More

All these years I've been approaching it the wrong way.

Want to have more sex? Men, stop helping with the chores
... a new study that finds men who help with the housework tend to have less sex.

The University of Washington research, published Wednesday in the American Sociological Review, suggests that heterosexual couples have more “sexual encounters” when each partner takes on traditional gender roles.

“Where the male is doing the male tasks and the female is doing the female tasks, those are the couples (who) are having more sex,” UW Associate Professor of Sociology and study co-author Julia Brines said...
Me man. Me hunt and grill.

You woman. You clean house and pleasure me.

I like it...

From People Who know What They're talking About

Go here.

Read the whole thing.

Share it.

Enough said...

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Ammo Follow-up

I mentioned in my last post that I'd gotten lucky in finding a supply of ammo, albeit limited. Here's a picture of the ammo shelves at the Cabela's in Buda, Texas, near my Central Texas home (about 250 miles from Laredo TX, where I found the ammo referenced in my previous post).

The picture is more representative of the ammo situation statewide, or even nationwide, than locally here in Laredo.

FWIW, the place where I bought the ammo also had Calloway golf balls on sale - 2 dozen for $25. I am equally accurate with firearms and golf clubs, and go through equivalent amounts of balls and bullets.

I need to find cheaper hobbies...


Found a place in Laredo that still has most popular calibers of ammo in stock, including .223.That's the good news.

The bad news is that selection is limited. For example, most of the handgun ammo was either that aluminum-cased Blazer stuff, or it was FMJ. For rifle cartridges there was very little variety in terms of manufacturer or bullet weight. Purchases are limited to one box per caliber per day. And the prices ... Oh My God. I damn near had to take out a bank loan to cover what I bought.

Still, beggars can't be choosers. At least I was able to snag some feedstock for my boomsticks. Another trip or two and I should be in reasonable shape.

At least until the wife sees the credit card bill...

What Color Is The Sky In Their World?

In a perfect example of life in bizarro-world, President Obama and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton defended their foreign policy record in the Middle East...

Just what exactly is it that barry and hillary are defending?
  • Four Americans, including an ambassador, were murdered in Libya when our consulate was overrun and destroyed. The obama/hillary response? It was all a video's fault.

Yep, sounds like they're doing one helluva good job over there.

At least hillary has an excuse.
Hillary Clinton talked about her health briefly this evening on 60 Minutes. "I still have some lingering effects from falling on my head," she said.
No doubt...

Monday, January 28, 2013

Quick Hits 2013.01.28

While cruising around rural Texas this weekend, I spied a bumper sticker proclaiming the following:
God Bless Our Troops
Especially The Snipers

And in other news, good ol' wacky Uncle Joe Biden has offered his advice on the weapon of choice for self-defense:
"It's harder to use an assault weapon to hit something than it is a shotgun. So, if you want to keep people away in an earthquake, buy some shotgun shells."
Earthquake?!? WTF?!? Anyway, far be it for me to question the recommendation of a world-renowned self-defense expert like Joe Biden. In fact, after watching the video below,  I really, really want to get my hands on one of those shotguns.

Seriously, after 200+ years of no change in the configuration of double-barreled shotguns, I find myself strangely attracted to this new version.

Two's company ... three's a crowd.

FOD Part Two 2013.01.28

Just ran across this. It got me so mad that it damn near made my blood literally boil.

Lifted in it's entirety from here.

Obama Cracks Joke When Asked About Four Dead Americans In Benghazi
When Steve Kroft of CBS News finally got around to asking President Obama and Secretary of State Clinton about the terrorist attacks in Benghazi resulting in the death of four brave Americans, President Obama decided it would be a good time to go for laughs. 
You know, I remember Bob Gates, you know, first thing he said to me, I think maybe first week or two that I was there and we were meeting in the Oval Office and he, obviously, been through seven presidents or something. And he says, "Mr. President, one thing I can guarantee you is that at this moment, somewhere, somehow, somebody in the federal government is screwing up." (Laughter)
It's disgusting to write-off the complete and total failure in Benghazi as nothing more than "someone in the federal government screwing up," it's even more enraging to do so in such a casual and flip way that is meant to engender laughter. 

Four Americans are dead.  They died while they fought off al-Qaeda terrorists whom President Obama assured us were "on the run" thanks to his leadership.  They died waiting for help that never came. 

It isn't funny, Mr. President.  You're right, somebody in the federal government screwed up.  You just don't realize who it was.
After that last paragraph, nothing further needs to be said.

FOD 2013.01.28

Not much time today, so just a quickie.

In an interview a few days ago obama was asked about his experience with firearms.
Q: Have you ever fired a gun?

A: Yes, in fact, up at Camp David, we do skeet shooting all the time.

Q: The whole family?

A: Not the girls, but oftentimes guests of mine go up there. And I have a profound respect for the traditions of hunting that trace back in this country for generations...
Yeah, right. I'll bet that limp-wristed poser doesn't even know which end the bullets come out.

Now contrast his statement above with his position on firearms when his was a candidate for the Illinois state senate.

In 1996 obama was running for the Illinois state Senate. A Chicago voters group, Independent Voters of Illinois, asked him this question. Here are his answers.
35. Do you support state legislation to:
a. ban the manufacture, sale and possession of handguns? Yes.
b. ban assault weapons? Yes.
c. mandatory waiting periods and background checks? Yes.
And this bozo allegedly knew enough about the Constitution to teach a course about it?

I don't think so...

Saturday, January 26, 2013

A Glimpse Of The Future

The golfer Phil Mickelson sounded off the other day about California's new, higher state income tax rates.
Phil Mickelson gave a civics lesson after his play Sunday in the final round of the Humana Challenge. The lecture: I’m not going to pay more in taxes than I can take home to my wife and kids.

As a longtime California resident, Mickelson vented after shooting a final-round 66 for a 17-under-par 271 total and tie for 37th in his 2013 debut. Last fall, Californians approved Proposition 30, which boosts the state income tax to 13.3 percent on earnings of $1 million or more. That’s a 29.1 percent increase from the previous “millionaires tax” in a state with tremendous fiscal issues.

Compound that increased liability with the recent changes to the federal tax code, which bumps the top bracket to 39.6 percent from 35 percent to avoid going over the so-called fiscal cliff, and Mickelson’s tax hit is substantial.
Predictably, he was excoriated by leftists who believe that they have a greater claim on Phil's -- and by extension, our -- money than he does. (Warning: Liberal claptrap followes. Put down all liquids before reading further.)
In his second inaugural, President Obama called upon us to rededicate ourselves to the nation's enduring values -- freedom and equality, and squaring those ideals with reality -- by rebuilding our country and its infrastructure, so that the pursuit of life, liberty and happiness will not be limited to the few who can buy them for themselves, but to the many, to "we the People." As Obama said, "The patriots of 1776 did not fight to replace the tyranny of a king with the privileges of a few."

We are now hearing from one of the privileged few, Phil Mickelson...

... Forty percent of $60 million is $24 million. Seems more than enough to feed your family, support your lifestyle and keep your private jet in the air.
First, the math: after state and federal income taxes, Mickelson is 'permitted' to keep 40% of his estimated $60 million annual income.

Second, the attitude: notice how 'they' believe that (a) they get to decide how much of your money you can keep; (b) you should be grateful for their generosity; and (c) they get to pass judgment on how you decide to spend YOUR money.


Anyway, back to the liberal drivel.
Coming on the day of the president's stirring inaugural, your complaint sounded a discordant, indeed sour note...

... Don't just be a taker.
"Stirring inaugural" my ass. It was nothing but a thinly veiled divisive attack on anyone whose views differ from the Anointed One. And how on God's green earth does that fool see Mickelson as a taker? Seems to me he's putting one helluva lot more into the state's kitty than he is taking out.

What the liberal clowns running California and their lackeys fail to realize is that Phil Mickelson and his fellow millionaires are just the tip of the iceberg.
One of the best indicators of a state’s economic health, according to John Merline, writing in Investor’s Business Daily, is the “U-Haul Index” (first publicized by economist Mark Perry) to see what people are paying to move into, or out of, the state. Renting a 20-foot truck one way from San Francisco to San Antonio, Texas, for example, costs $1,693. Going in the other direction, however, costs only $983 for the same truck.
Gee, thanks a lot. If I want to see a bunch of over-aged spaced-out granola-eating hippies I'll just go up the road a ways and visit Austin.
It isn't all about taxes, however. (California's) regulatory environment and yawning fiscal deficits are chasing companies away to more favorable locales. Part is the state’s determined efforts to increase still further its tax burden on high income earners — now an astounding 13 percent — along with its implementation of policies favored by the Obama administration in Washington. As Joel Kotkin of put it,
California will serve as the prime testing ground for President Obama’s form of post-economic liberalism. Every dream program that the Administration embraces — cap and trade, massive taxes on the rich, high-speed rail — is either in place or on the drawing boards.
Despite the state’s efforts to redistribute the wealth from those who earned it to those who didn't, “the ranks of the poor have swollen to the point that the state, with 12% of the nation’s population, accounts for one-third of its welfare cases,” notes Kotkin.
That last paragraph is very telling. Build a liberal utopia and it'll last until the people with jobs get tired of paying for an army of faceless 'dependents.' Intelligent, hard working, successful people are voting with their feet and moving out. People who are unable or unwilling to find and hold good-paying jobs are likewise voting with their feet and staying put or moving in.

Take that 'punish the successful' approach and extend it to businesses. What happens? They bail out of that failed state as fast as they can.
Today, California is experiencing the fastest rate of disinvestment events based on public domain information, closure notices to the state, and information from affected employees in the three years since a specialized tracking system was put into place.

(California's) losses are occurring at an accelerated rate. Also, no one knows the real level of activity because smaller companies are not required to file layoff notices with the state. A conservative estimate is that only 1 out of 10 company departures becomes public knowledge, which means California may suffer more than 2,000 disinvestment events this year. The capital directed to out-of-state or out-of-country, while difficult to calculate, is nonetheless in the billions of dollars.

The top five destinations are (1) Texas, (2) Arizona, (3) Colorado, (4) Nevada and Utah tied; and (5) Virginia and North Carolina tied.

Six of those seven states are Right to Work states. Only Colorado is not.

Five of those seven states are in the Top 10 of states with the best business climate. Texas is #1, followed in order by Utah at #2, Virginia at #3, then North Carolina (#4) and Colorado (#8). Arizona checks in at #22, California is #40, and Nevada is ranked at #45. The only reason I can think of for businesses relocating from CA to NV is because Nevada is just across the state line, so it's a short move. (I know - doesn't make much sense to me either.)

In addition to taxes, there's a bloated and business-hating regulatory bureaucracy to contend with.
Sadly, even if California chooses to lower its taxes it still may not be enough; the regulatory red tape is simply too onerous and costly. Hardee’s and Carl’s Jr. restaurants are no longer expanding in California as it takes roughly two years to get through the regulatory process for one restaurant.(TWO YEARS?!?!? Unfrigginbelievable) Compare this with Texas where it takes about six weeks and $200,000 less. If this is what it takes for a fast food chain to get started, one can only imagine what it takes for a large business to move in. Even the companies that aren’t leaving California are expanding elsewhere. Google, eBay, and Intel are all opening new locations outside California.

So wake up, America! That's our future if we allow obama and his ilk to implement their agenda on a national basis.

Talk about 'failed policies'...

Friday, January 25, 2013

Friday Follies Happy Hour 2013.01.25

One of my all-time favorites.

Back in the day when bars had real jukeboxes that took quarters instead of credit cards -- and before karaoke came along -- I've been known to stand up and sing along with this one.


Why I Carry

No philosophical musings.

No long diatribes about the importance of our Constitutional rights.

Just a simple pragmatic statement.

I carry because I'm too young to die and too old to get beat up.

My old grandpa said to me ‘Son, there comes a time in every man’s life when he stops bustin’ knuckles and starts bustin’ caps and usually it’s when he becomes too old to take an ass whoopin.’

I don’t carry a gun to kill people. I carry a gun to keep from being killed.

I don’t carry a gun to scare people. I carry a gun because sometimes this world can be a scary place.

I don’t carry a gun because I’m paranoid. I carry a gun because there are real threats in the world..

I don’t carry a gun because I’m evil. I carry a gun because I have lived long enough to see the evil in the world.

I don’t carry a gun because I hate the government. I carry a gun because I understand the limitations of government..

I don’t carry a gun because I’m angry. I carry a gun so that I don’t have to spend the rest of my life hating myself for failing to be prepared.

I don’t carry a gun because I want to shoot someone. I carry a gun because I want to die at a ripe old age in my bed, and not on a sidewalk somewhere tomorrow afternoon.

I don’t carry a gun to make me feel like a man. I carry a gun because men know how to take care of themselves and the ones they love.

I don’t carry a gun because I feel inadequate. I carry a gun because unarmed and facing three armed thugs, I am inadequate.

I don’t carry a gun because I love it. I carry a gun because I love life and the people who make it meaningful to me.

Police protection is an oxymoron. Free citizens must protect themselves. Police do not protect you from crime, they usually just investigate the crime after it happens and then call someone in to clean up the mess.

Personally, I carry a gun because I’m too young to die and too old to take an ass whoopin'
-- author unknown

Thursday, January 24, 2013

Random Observations 2013.01.23

Still dealing with issues arising from the start of the new semester. meanwhile, from around the Web:

If this isn't the most idiotic idea to ever come out of Hollywood, it's definitely in contention for the Top 10.
Hollywood actor David Arquette said he would support President Barack Obama and Congress regulating the depiction of ammunition in Hollywood films.

“Hey, listen, if you want to restrict the amount of bullets that fit in a magazine and then restrict that also from being able to show that amount of bullets in a clip on a movie screen, I’m totally down with it. Go for it,” Arquette told TheDC on Inauguration Day.
First they go after the Second Amendment, then they take aim at the First. But the damn leftists are too stupid to make the connection. And I'm not referring to the magazine vs. clip nonsense spouted by that fool.

On a more pleasant topic, at the risk of providing you TMI I will simply note that one of my practices has been found to be beneficial.
A recent study showed that less than 10 percent of Americans sleep in the buff. Whaa? Not only is it dead sexy, experts swear naked sleep is actually good for you. We asked them to spill on the top reasons you should ditch those pajamas for good.

1. You'll Air Out Your Hoo-Ha

Okay, maybe not directly applicable to me, but the rest of the reasons are.

2. You'll Sleep Better

"Your body temp progressively declines as you sleep, which is a natural tendency of the body, so being too warm with heavy PJs and blankets can disrupt that." Sleeping naked, (says Lisa Shives, MD) says, can help your body stay cool.

3. You'll Look Hotter

"As your body temperature drops, growth hormone is released and works its regenerative magic," (naturopath Natasha Turner) says. And that keeps your skin and hair looking awesome.

 4. You'll Lose Belly Fat

Sleeping naked helps you sleep more soundly, which will allow your levels of the stress hormone cortisol to decrease as you rest, keeping your energy and hunger levels in check...

 5. You'll Feel More Confident

"We can tune in to sensations like the feeling of the sheets and the coolness of the air, which can be very sexy" ... "And feeling sexy increases confidence."

6. You'll Have Better Sex

... sleeping naked is great for your relationship because laying skin to skin will increase feel-good chemicals like the cuddle hormone oxytocin. "Sleeping naked encourages sexier relationships..."

On the other hand, proving that every silver lining has a cloud, there's this profoundly disturbing news.
A forthcoming erotic novel being described as “fan fiction” will feature the first couple as protagonists-in-chief. According to Pop Culture Public Relations, the firm representing the book’s publisher, the novel, a version of a “personalizable” erotic tome, will be printed with the first couple’s names in it and available online at no cost on January 28. In an e-mail circulated yesterday, Pop Culture PR wrote, “Barack and Michelle Obama Star in This Erotic, Romantic Novel.”

Surely American literature will reach new heights with the publication of GuestHouse Games, in which the Obamas, “alone in their isolated beachfront guesthouse in the tropical paradise of Kailua, Hawaii,” are “drawn into the ancient Hawaiian spiritual world and into the exploration of their own deepest and most forbidden desires.”
The mental images are seared into my brain. It burns, it burns! Must self-medicate with massive doses of Shiner...

Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Why Professors Drink 2013.01.23

The Spring 2013 semester started yesterday. Hopefully the first day wasn't a foretaste of things to come, because it flat-out sucked. Clueless students (even more clueless than usual, and greater numbers of them to boot), clueless faculty (ditto), and even more ignorant and arrogant then usual administrators. Example:

The State of Texas is still experiencing a budget crunch (the budget cycle is a two-year cycle, so we are still operating under the budget passed two years ago, when funds were tight). Our university responded by increasing the number of students necessary for a class to officially 'make' - that is, there must be a certain number of students registered for a class, or else that class is cancelled. It used to be that 5 students was sufficient. now it is 10. The university also increased the number of classes that each faculty member must teach. On the surface, that might seem to make sense. But...

We've had several classes cancelled that students needed to graduate. So the kids have to stick around for another semester or two, which forces many of them to choose between running up even more student loan debt or dropping out. Alternatively, the faculty is asked to teach a "special topics" course for which the faculty doesn't get paid, and which doesn't count towards our workload. I'm teaching one this semester for seven students. Two years ago that would have been a regular class. This year it's an 'off the books' class. Basically I had to choose between teaching an additional class 'for free' or screwing the students.

Now combine fewer classes being offered with an administrative mandate that the faculty teach more classes and what happens? Larger classes are split into multiple sections, which result in two or more faculty members teaching the same number of students that used to be taught by one. Money actually saved? $Zero.

In short, no money is saved, and the people we are here to help -- the students -- are adversely affected. When this is pointed out to the administration it is met with a blank stare and a shrug of the shoulders.

Here's another example. I teach a large online class - the Intro to Information Systems course. I've been doing this for several years now and have gotten it to the point where it runs pretty smoothly. Since it's an online course, I can teach large numbers of students (large for us is 100+) relatively efficiently and effectively. This semester one of the other faculty had a class that didn't make, so the powers-that-be split my online course in half and assigned the second half to him. He's never taught an online course before, so I'll have to hold his hand and walk him through the semester, effectively doubling or even tripling my workload for that course.

To make matters worse, the registrar's office screwed up the process of assigning students to the two different classes. They were originally registered for a single class - mine. Since the course was split, half of them had to be reassigned to the new class. However, some were assigned to both classes, while some were dropped and not assigned to either one. All this occurred on the first day of class, which of course got everyone confused and frustrated. When we finally figured out what had happened and contacted the registrar to get things straightened out, here was his response.
"Once the proper forms are submitted to our office, we’ll update accordingly."
That sound you just heard was the cap being removed from another bottle of Shiner...

Cleaning Out The In-Box

Classes started today - more on that fluster-cluck later.

Lots of other stuff going on, so rather than come up with something original I'll kill two birds with one stone and clean out my email in-box while at the same time gathering material for a post.

Multitasking rules...

George Bush, Queen Elizabeth, and Vladimir Putin all die and go to hell.

While there, they spy a red phone and ask what the phone is for. The devil tells them it is for calling back to Earth.

Putin asks to call Russia and talks for 5 minutes. When he is finished the devil informs him that the      cost is a million dollars. Putin writes him a check.

Next, Queen Elizabeth calls England and talks for 30 minutes. When she is finished the devil informs her that the cost is 6 million dollars. She writes him a check.

Finally, George Bush gets his turn and  talks for 4 hours. When he is finished the devil informs him that the cost is $5.00.

When Putin hears this he goes ballistic and asks the devil why Bush got to call the USA so cheaply.

The devil smiles and replies, "Since Obama took over, the country has gone to hell, so it's a local call."

Boudreaux take his wife Cloteele, to a dance down on the bayou, las' weekend.

There was this guy on the dance floor dancin' like crazy - breakdancin', moonwalkin', back flips--the whole works.

Cloteele turn to Boudreaux and say, "See dat guy? Twenty-five year ago, he propose to me and I turn him down." 

Boudreaux say, "Look like he still celebratin'!"

A guy is 75 years old and loves to fish.

He was sitting in his boat the other day when he heard a voice say, "Pick me up." He looked around and couldn't see anyone.

He thought he was dreaming when he heard the voice say again, "Pick me up."

He looked in the water and there, floating on the top, was a frog.

The man said, "Are you talking to me?"

The frog said, "Yes, I'm talking to you.  "Pick me up, then kiss me and I'll turn into the most beautiful woman you have ever seen. I'll make sure that all your friends are envious and jealous, because I will be your bride!"

The man looked at the frog for a short time, reached over, picked it up carefully and placed it in his shirt pocket.

The frog said, "What, are you nuts?  Didn't you hear what I said?" I said, "Kiss me, and I will be your beautiful bride."

He opened his pocket, looked at the frog and said, "Nah. At my age, I'd rather have a talking frog."

With age comes wisdom.

A family was driving behind a garbage truck when a large dildo flies out and hits the windshield.

To hide her embarrassment the mother turns and says to her young kids, "My, what a big insect!"

To which her 7 year old says, "I'm surprised it could fly with a dick that big."

A surgeon went to check on his patient after an operation. "You'll be fine," he said.

She asked ... “How long will it be before I am able to have a normal sex life again doctor?"

The surgeon seemed to pause, which alarmed the girl.

"What's the matter Doctor?  I will be all right, won't I?"

He replied ...

“Oh yes, you'll be fine. It's just that no one has ever asked me that after having their tonsils out."

A  cowboy appeared before St. Peter at the Pearly  Gates.

'Have you ever done anything of  particular merit?' St. Peter  asked.

'Well,  I can think of one thing,' the cowboy  offered. 'On  a trip to the Black Hills out in South Dakota , I came  upon a gang of bikers who were threatening a young  woman. I directed them to leave her alone, but they  wouldn't  listen.'

'So I approached the largest and most tattooed biker and smacked him in the face, kicked his bike over, ripped out his nose ring, and threw it on the ground. I  yelled, 'Now, back off or I'll kick the shit out of  all of  you!

St.  Peter was impressed, 'When did this  happen?'

'Couple  of minutes  ago.'

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

The Spirit Moves Me

A couple of days ago Harper had a reflective post regarding the importance of children having something to believe in.

In a moment of weakness I responded with one of my favorite quotes:
“Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer.”
 -- W.C. Fields
Inappropriate, yes. But a seed was planted. It brought to mind a story I read recently about a new alternative to the traditional Sunday morning church service taking place in the small Central Texas town of Bulverde, about 20 miles from my home. A new spiritual movement is awakening there, one that I find attractive.

Spirits served along with spirituality
Uncorked cabernet bottles are the table centerpieces for a midweek ritual ... at a local wine bar.

Steve Coker, the group's spiritual leader, prefers the locale. To him, the bar is as valid a place for worship as is San Fernando Cathedral.
Amen, brother!
A licensed Methodist minister, he's not redefining church, he says, but returning to the down-to-earth picture of the first Christians described in the New Testament book of Acts.

“They broke bread and met in homes for prayer,” Coker said. “They read Scripture and cared for the less fortunate. We have all the elements of what that Acts church had.”
Makes sense to me. Have a little something to eat and drink, spend a little time in reflection, and help others. Body, mind, and soul are all nourished.
As bottles empty into glasses, Coker tosses out a current issue to weigh in on. Nothing's off limits — from ways to combat poverty or stem illegal immigration to presidential preferences.

“Wine is something that is good for the heart. It relaxes the mind,” Caleb Haynes said at a recent gathering. “I think heaven will have a big area just for wine.”
I like that idea. Building on it, if Heaven has a wine bar, it's not too much of a stretch to envision a tavern up there as well, serving beer and mixed drinks. After all, angels get thirsty too.

Where do you think the term "Honky Tonk Angels" came from...?

Monday, January 21, 2013

Me And My 1911A1 Alter Ego

With all the current fuss about 'gun safety' I thought this quiz was timely. It asks the ever-popular question "What type of handgun are you?"

I am pleased and proud to report that I'm the time-tested and classic .45 ACP 1911A1.

What type of handgun are you?
Your Result: Colt Model 1911A1
Designed by John Browning and adopted by the US military in 1911, the 1911 has spawned countless variants and is one of the most popular handguns of all time. Many experts consider the 1911 the epitome of fighting handgun design. It is most commonly chambered for the famous .45 ACP cartridge.

Give it a try and let me know how it works out for you.

FOD 2013.01.21

When you the media's fawning reports of obama's inauguration speech, just remember that the SCOAMF speaks with a forked tongue.

The economy:

The evil rich:

The republican's war on women:

Protecting our children:

What an asshole...

Sunday, January 20, 2013

Sunday Funnies 2013.01.20

Inauguration Day looms ... four more years of the worst president ever.

We laugh to keep from crying.

Approximately 800,000 obama supporters are expected at his inauguration, but only 14 of them will miss work.

"President Obama will be sworn in with his hand resting on two Bibles. Is that how screwed up Washington is now? One Bible can't get the job done anymore?" –Jay Leno

"The White House announced today that the theme for President Obama's second inauguration will be 'Faith in America's Future.' The idea is to get our minds off of America's present." –Jay Leno

Click to embiggen.

Saturday, January 19, 2013

One More...

... asshole who needs to go away - or at least officially join the democrats, since he's more and more on their side.

Chris Christie, who recently stabbed the NRA in the back.
Blunt-speaking New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie, thought to be eyeing a 2016 run for the Republican presidential nomination, blasted an NRA ad that mentions President Barack Obama's daughters as "reprehensible" and warned it "demeans" the powerful gun-rights group.
Take a hike, Chris. It was fun while it lasted.

Tired Of Their Sh!t

Just go away...

... Lance Armstrong
He cheated. He lied. He did some good stuff. He's old news and I'm tired of him. Go away, Lance.

... Manti Te'o
Is he a victim? Is he in on the hoax? I don't know and I don't care. Go away, Manti.

... Congress and the Debt Ceiling
The federal government is out of money - again. obama is threatening to stop Social Security and unemployment checks - again. Congress has failed to fix the problem and is kicking the can down the road - again. I feel the need for a drink - again.

... The whole damn bunch of them - for God's sake, please just go away!!!

Adjudicate This!

Far be it from me to take pleasure in the misery of others, but in this case I can't help but feel a tiny warm glow deep down in the dark recesses of my soul.

There are two law school graduates for every job opening.
Nationally there are twice as many graduates as there are jobs. The Bureau of Labor Statistics estimates that the economy will provide 21,880 new jobs for lawyers annually between 2010 and 2020; law schools since 2010, however, have produced more than 44,000 graduates each year. Yet schools continue to enroll more students than the market demands and to raise tuition faster than inflation. The result is exploding debt loads for current students and graduates whose employment prospects are appalling.

To be sure, the employment prospects for Americans across a broad swath of society have been grim in recent years. But the legal profession has clearly lost any reputation it might have once had as a safe, prosperous haven in troubled times.
Maybe if we had fewer lawyers there would be fewer burdensome regulations and fewer cases of lawsuit abuse hamstringing the economy.

Not to mention fewer lawyers screwing their clients - literally.
An Eagan (MN) lawyer is suspended indefinitely after having an affair with a client whom he represented in a divorce, then billing her for time they spent having sex.

The woman met with Lowe in August 2011 to discuss pursuing a divorce from her husband.

He agreed to represent her. During a phone call days later, Lowe asked about her sexual relationship with her husband, commented on her appearance and asked if she was interested in sex with him.

The following month, they began an affair that lasted until March. At various points, Lowe billed the woman for legal services on the dates of their sexual encounters, coding the time as meetings or drafting memos.
It wasn't his first time breaking the rules, either.
In addition to a few previous citations for issues of decorum, Lowe was placed on probation in 1997 for using cocaine and being involved in purchasing the drug from a client.
On the bright side, that's one more job opening for a recent graduate...

Friday, January 18, 2013

Friday Follies Happy Hour 2013.01.18

The story of my life - too many of the wrong kind of changes...

Points To Ponder

I was wasting my time browsing obama's list of executive actions that he is using to gut the Second Amendment "keep guns out of the hands of dangerous people."

Two points:

#11 on the list is "Nominate an ATF director"

Wait just a minute there, sparky. obama is the President. As such, he is the person who nominates the ATF director. So in essence, barry is issuing an executive order to himself to do his job.

In the words of my old pal Bugs Bunny, "What a maroon."

The second observation involves an executive action that obama didn't include on the list. I've taken the liberty of adding it for him.

#24 - Stop supplying weapons to Mexican drug cartels.

Thursday, January 17, 2013

That Didn't Take Long

NY governor Andrew Cuomo's new, much-ballyhooed gun-control legislation has plenty of flaws. Here's the most embarrassing one.
A troubling oversight has been found within New York State's sweeping new gun laws.

The ban on having high-capacity magazines, as it's written, would also include law enforcement officers.

Magazines with more than seven rounds will be illegal under the new law when that part takes effect in March.

As the statute is currently written, it does not exempt law enforcement officers.

Nearly every law enforcement agency in the state carries hand guns that have a 15 round capacity.

State Senator Eric Adams, a former NYPD Captain, told us he's going to push for an amendment next week to exempt police officers from the high-capacity magazine ban. In his words, "You can't give more ammo to the criminals."
But it's evidently okay to give the criminals firearms that are denied to law-abiding citizens.


Someone Is Not Paying Attention

Words fail me...

Pelosi: More Gun Control Needed Because ‘We Took an Oath to Protect and Defend’
Nancy Pelosi held a House Democratic Steering and Policy Committee hearing on "Gun Violence Prevention: A Call to Action,” where she endorsed the gun control proposals President Barack Obama unveiled today.

“Earlier this month, shortly after Newtown, all members of Congress took an oath to protect and defend the Constitution and the American people,” Pelosi said.  “To protect and defend.  That is our first responsibility.”
Two problems with that statement:

One, nowhere in the oath taken by members of congress does the phrase "protect and defend" appear.

Two, nowhere in the oath taken by members of congress does the phrase "the American people" appear. In fact, there is no reference to people at all - just the Constitution.

Here's the actual oath the congresscritters take (and routinely ignore).
“I, (name of Member), do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I take this obligation freely, without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; and that I will well and faithfully discharge the duties of the office on which I am about to enter. So help me God.”
Just another example of how pelosi and her ilk fail to comprehend their most basic responsibilities...

Stand And Fight

I'm a member of the NRA. I haven't always agreed with everything they've done in the past, but at this point I am 100% in favor of their aggressive actions in fighting back against the vultures looking to score political points over the bodies of dead children. To that end, I am publishing below a letter from Wayne LaPierre, NRA Executive Vice President.
It's not about protecting children. It's not about stopping crime.

It's about banning your guns…PERIOD!

Last week, NRA sat in on a White House meeting that was sold to the public as an "open discussion" about how to improve school safety. But that was a dirty lie.

They didn't listen to gun owners' concerns…they didn't consider any real solutions on how we can keep our kids safe…instead Barack Obama, Joe Biden, and their gun ban allies in Congress only want to BLAME you, VILIFY you, BULLY you, and STRIP you of your Second Amendment freedoms.

Right now, they're steamrolling ahead with legislation that would ban your guns, register your ammunition purchases, and even force you to register the firearms you already own with Obama's anti-gun bureaucrats.

I warned you this day was coming and now it's here. This is the fight of the century and I need you on board with NRA now more than ever.

I urge you to renew or upgrade your NRA membership as soon as possible. If it's more convenient for you to do so online, you can follow this link:
Now is the time when I need you and every gun owner to put an NRA membership card in your wallet and STAND AND FIGHT for our freedom. No one can take your place at the front lines of this battle…if we lose now, we lose everything.

The media has been on a vicious tirade to slander and intimidate you, me, and our fellow NRA members. We've been called terrorists and worse. They've blamed us and our Second Amendment freedoms for the actions of violent criminals and madmen. Our lives have been threatened.

But I won't let these brutal and bitterly personal attacks on you and me go unchallenged. I'll fight freedom's enemies. I'll fight to make our schools safer. And I'll fight for your fundamental right to self-defense and your sacred Right to Keep and Bear Arms.

But my strength, and the strength of our entire NRA organization comes from you and your strong commitment to our membership. I need you in our corner TODAY.

Thank you for your friendship and your support. Your letters and your words of encouragement mean more to me than you could ever imagine.

Together, we will defend our freedom.


Wayne LaPierre
Executive Vice President

The gutless weasel currently befouling the air in the White House doesn't even have the cojones to face congress and the American people mano a mano. Instead, he has resorted to a slew of Executive Orders in a desperate attempt to perform an end-run around the Constitution.

If you're not a NRA member, please consider joining. If you are a member, please consider making an extra donation to the most effective group fighting for our right to keep and bear arms.

If not now, when?

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Come And Take It

In 480 B.C. the forces of the Persian Empire under King Xerxes, numbering approximately two million men, invaded ancient Greece with the intention of conquering the Greek city-states and enslaving the people.

King Leonidas of Sparta met the invaders at Thermopylae with 300 hand-picked troops. When a Persian envoy demanded the Spartans surrender their weapons, Leonidas defiantly replied "Molon Labe," which translates as "Come and Get Them."

Today there is a monument at Thermopylae with the words ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒΕ (Molon Labe) inscribed on it.

In 1778 during the American Revolution, a contingent of 500 British soldiers plus artillery approached Fort Morris in Georgia, defended by less than 150 Continental soldiers. The British demanded the Americans surrender. The fort's commander, Colonel John McIntosh, replied:

"As to surrendering the fort, receive this laconic reply: COME AND TAKE IT!".

The British withdrew.

Fifty-seven years later, in October 1835, 150 mounted Mexican soldiers approached the Texas town of Gonzales to seize a small cannon. Eighteen Texans opposed them. The Mexicans paused and set up camp for the night.

In the early morning hours of October 2, 1835, the Texans -- with the cannon -- attacked the Mexican camp. The Texans carried a hastily constructed flag emblazoned with a drawing of the cannon and the words "Come And Take It."

The Mexicans retreated from Gonzales to San Antonio, a distance of some 75 miles.

Gonzales became known as “The Lexington of Texas.” Each October a "Come And Take It" festival is held there to celebrate the defiance and courage of those early Texans.

That brings us to today. The weasel-in-chief, callously and disgracefully using children alive and dead for political purposes, and shamelessly aided and abetted by the lickspittles of the media, is waging an unprecedented war against the Second Amendment of the Constitution of the United States of America.

It's obvious that gun-control advocates have no use for facts or logic. Rather, their position is based on pure emotion. Reasoning with them is a waste of time. I've had as much of their self-righteous sanctimonious crap as I can take. So I was glad to see the NRA take this stance.

Stand and Fight

Lest anyone think this is overreaction, consider this. The federal government's actions have shown there is no aspect of our lives too trivial for them to intrude upon.

In 1994 the federal government made the traditional toilets that I grew up with illegal.

In 2007 the government banned incandescent light bulbs.

Not satisfied with my toilet or my light bulbs, now the feds are coming for my guns.

Here's my response.